Stories Untold: Maelstrom of Hearts
by stormgirl92
Summary: Storm, a brand new guardian, doesn't see the world the way she should. Its a place where her emotions have taken hold and she seeks to find answers from a long forgotten past. Can she gather the strength to make it through the trials and heartbreak that she feels or will it come back around and wind up killing her in the end. (Eventual Romance, slow-burn)
1. Chapter 1

Love, it's not worth it, or is it? It burns the soul. Killing you slowly, painfully, horrendously. The heat of another burning on the skin of desire. I hated it, I loved it, I went crazy. I burned, I pleaded, I bled. I needed it, I lived for it. My soul was captured and I lost it all. I lost my life, my love, my world. I was angry, burning, pained. I loved him and they took him from me. I didn't care for life after that. I couldn't care for life after that. What was the point really? I wanted one thing. Just one and it was ripped from, taken from my hands. It was an ugly circle of life. Ugly and disgusting... but I craved it. What a contradiction? Not really that sane, barely enough sanity to say... I'm a Guardian.

* * *

"Eyes up guardian"

It's the first thing I heard. While my vision cleared, I took a look around, completely disoriented. What the hell happened to me? I feel like I got hit by a damn train. Wait, what was a train? I shook my head and looked around at the dusty beaten metal shapes, broken crumbling walls and destroyed trees. The level of dust that covered the world seemed to stick to everything, coating it creating a pale light. The landscape was a broken masterpiece, somberly beautiful. What the hell had happened here? Who decided to destroy the world. As I looked around a white object with a glowing blue light seemed to talk to me, the blue light emitting from the glass in the center and the outside casing was white and black. It wasn't that big, maybe a map for someone? Its geometrical shape floating in mid air in front of my eye-line. It almost looked like one of those old children's toys that used to expand and contract. Not that I could clearly picture that, I couldn't picture really anything, just vague images of what was.

"What the hell are you?"

It seemed to become irked at my words. I mean how was I supposed to react to the thing?

"I'm a ghost! It's not safe here though, I'll explain more later."

I kept thinking what the hell's a ghost. I couldn't keep any of my thoughts straight. Like someone through my brain in a blender. Annoyed and grumbling, I stood up with wobbly legs, unsure of what the hell I was doing. I followed the little white ball reluctantly, fed up with whatever this was. We made our way to the wall, crossing through a small path between the metal shapes. I felt lost, alone, scared, angry and confused. I had no idea what was to come or who I was and this world looked foreign to me. The images that were in my mind was nothing like the desolated landscape surrounding me. The ghost disappeared from sight, leaving me unnerved as a looked every which way for what I now deemed an extremely intelligent machine.

"I'm still with you guardian. Do not fret."

I simply nodded in response as the ghost gave me instructions. I was seriously in auto-pilot mode, not being able to care that I had just woken up. We clambered through the wall from a hole in it. Inside the dark, twisted metal scaffolding gleamed amber in the dying light of the outside world. The musty smell of rust and blood assaulted my nose as I... No; as we made our way through the piping. I'm going to have get used to this thing being invisible and able to hear everything I'm saying. Though not for lack of trying I couldn't seem to get a grasp on myself and my mind. The ghost, which I will now consider a he because that's what it sounds like, found a weapon for me as we ran into what he called enemies of the light, the fallen. I wasn't expecting what I saw. It was something out of a horror genre, monsters in purple uniforms with three fingers and two talons for feet stood in front of me. Almost snarling in disgust. It was almost like a jealous rage. Wait, what was i even thinking? Images kept flashing, nothing made sense. Everything happened so quick and before I knew it, I was shooting and fighting trying to steal a ship from them. Their blood ran down the tattered rags of armor that I found, somewhere... Could I please get my act together… Shit, this is annoying how can I not remember where I picked this crap up? I knew we couldn't fight forever in this place so the ship was our only option, something that would take us to safety. My movements almost felt mechanical, that I wasn't in control of myself, like it was instinctual, or a puppet. Actually, it felt more like someone downloaded this information into my brain, and deleted everything else. Or maybe it was instinct I don't know. What I did know is I was left with someone who only fought. No humanity, just fighting. I really hoped that would change. I used to know the word for this. This feeling I felt but for some reason it would not form. Stuck on the tip of my tongue. I thought hard as my body mechanically took over and shot another fallen dreg into the ground. I remembered…

A soldier. A machine. A killer. Murderer... Murderer... Murderer.

I knew these words, they echoed in my mind, painfully pulling new memories that invaded my vision.

 _"Get down!"_

 _An explosion rocked to my right. Sounds of gunfire and bombs went off in proximity to myself._

 _"King you still with us?"_

 _My voice echoed. Another female voice to my left was speaking._

The image faded and pain shot up my leg. I got fucking shot. Who the fuck spaces out in the middle of fighting. Blood began seeping though the cloth armor dripping down my leg. I had become sloppy while remembering a time long since passed. I should not try and think about who I am when I'm fighting for my life, that is not a good idea, I am now taking note to not do such a stupid ass thing again. I whirled around on the vandal who shot me and put a bullet right between its eyes. Anger surging through me lighting my blood on fire. I reveled in the kill and the precision in which I did so. The ship was so close to being ours but... I wanted more, I didn't want to stop... the smell of blood, the taste of rust on my tongue. Adrenaline and lust for these enemies lives coursed through my veins. It awakened something deep to the surface, a primal instinct. I wanted to destroy them for causing injuring me, for giving me this shitty introduction to the living world. For Christ sake, I just gto woken up after being dead for god knows how long, give the girl a break!

"Fuck it!"

I lost myself in the fight. A massive fallen appeared from a hole in the wall and I grinned and turned about to engage it… Until the ghost transported me aboard the ship with no warning, or at least one I heard. I didn't get to finish my kill and get my prize, so I sat down in the cockpit pouting. Childish, though it may be, I shouldn't have been disappointed.

"You're not ready for an archaeon yet. We can come back when you are!"

The red from my vision slowly faded and I started to shake in the seat. What the hell was that anger, those thoughts. I went crazy, I wanted to kill, I looked down at my hands in fear, knowing I had taken another creatures life… but instead of disgust it brought me comfort. That was not right. I should not be comforted by the sight of blood. Who the hell am I? I realized at this point I had no real memory of who I was nor even what my name was. A set grimace flashed across my face. How could I be alive and have zero memories. Just feelings and random images that didn't feel like my own. I didn't know why I was so angry either. I felt cheated somehow.

"Ghost... You care to explain what the hell that was? Who the fallen are? What the light is? And the most important question, who and what am I?"

Yes, I was aggravated. Tired, however that was possible, I wanted a coffee... the bitter taste I remembered. And I was in pain. Waves of annoyance rolled off of me and unfortunately the only other individual here was the machine. The ghost seemed to blink at me unsure maybe even scared.

"You are what's called a guardian, someone who is chosen by the traveler to help fight the darkness. You are brought back to life from a different time in order to put whatever skills you may have had in a previous life to use. The fallen are only a very small portion of this darkness, not much is really known about why they are trying to kill us but they are. The traveler is the light. It came to us one day to give us a gift. A gift of power. The power to not die and the power to heal. Even the power to destroy its enemies. As for who you are, that I do not know. Us ghosts only get a feeling about who our guardian is supposed to be. Some of us spend years trying to find you. I got lucky, I was created and I had this feeling to go find you! And I did! So, I brought you back to life using the light!"

My eye twitched. Power to heal... Why am I still bleeding all over the place then?

"If you can heal, mind patching up the knee please?"

The ghost immediately shined a light onto my knee which completely healed it. I breathed I sigh of relief. The pain had faded and I felt as good as new. I sat looking at the scenery pass before me. It was weird to see that I was flying again. I scrunched my face up in aggravation. Stupid half images. What the hell do I do now? A thought came to me, I'm comforted by the killing because it's something I know how to do, something I can remember. That's why this is important. I guess it's not so bad, at least I know I'm not a horrible person, just that it's familiar. I still didn't know who I was but, I was okay now that I had something familiar. I looked towards the ghost expectantly.

"So, in reviving me...do I come with a name? I can't seem to remember it…"

The ghost seemed to look at me, or what I assume was looking at me.

"Most guardians remember their names by this point. You're telling me you don't?"

I shook my head almost solemnly. Great something was wrong with me. Figures!

 _"Hey, can you hear me? You've been in an explosion. I'm here to help"_

 _My body felt heavy as I closed my eyes in pain. This was how I was to end._

 _"Can you remember your name, age, date of birth."_

 _I opened my eyes in a panic, breathing becoming hitched. I didn't know who I was or what happened._

I shook my head to get rid of the memory, or what I thought was a memory. The ghost seemed to think a moment before speaking again.

"Then how about Storm?"

My eyebrow raised.

"How'd you get that name?"

The ghost seemed to be smiling, its parts moving in excitement.

"Because of your unpredictability and also your ruthlessness in combat."

I shot the ghost a look. He couldn't be serious… He was, He was completely serious! I snapped back a remark.

"What about you, I can't just call you ghost all the time."

The ghost seemed to be beaming.

"Well then Storm, I guess you get to give me a name!"

I deflated with his enthusiasm and smiled at the ghost. A quick glimpse of another memory from long ago flashed across my mind.

"What about Arthur?"

The ghost flitted about.

"I like it. Where's it from?"

I smiled at him.

"It's from a very old legend. About King Arthur."

The ghost flitted about some more. Seemingly in joy that I had named him.

"You'll have to tell me the tale another time. We are here!"

I was teleported. Just like that into one if the most amazing structures I had ever seen in my short life. The grass under my boots didn't feel as I had expected it to, soft and comforting, but the wind in my hair and the smells of food where overwhelming. The chatter was almost painful to the ears. It seemed like everyone was talking and no one at all. The walls seemed to be giving off an unnatural light that was both welcoming and threatening. I turned around to look at the traveler and was brought to the point of tears. The light was both too bright and hot yet soft and cool. It felt like I had finally come home. Finally found the place I was meant to be. I just sat down a while and took in my surroundings. It took my breath away, I didn't know why I was crying, it was an overwhelming rush, but i didn't know if it was from the beauty of the place or for memories lost. It could have been both. I lost an hour just sitting there in the light, running through feelings i couldn't quiet sort out.

"Are you ready to meet the vanguard? You'll like the hunter vanguard, he's a bit off the wall."

I was a bit confused.

"Hunter?"

Arthur I could almost see become frustrated with himself. If he had hands he probably would've smacked himself.

"I'm sorry, I didn't explain! When you wake up as a guardian, there are three different classes of guardian that are randomly assigned. You have hunters, which is what your class is, warlocks, and titans. Hunters are wild, love to explore and hate to be cooped up for too long. Warlocks are infused with magic, they can harness powers through their bodies. Titans are a class of their own. They are the heavy hitters. They can create shields and barriers to protect others that are with them. Each class have three different types of energy they can use, void energy, solar energy and arc energy. It's easy to switch between them all and certain energies work with certain situations better."

My head was spinning at this point. I was suffering from information overload. Wait a minute, powers, energy, holy crap what? Is this a joke? The ghost seemed to be excited about this. Arthur continued.

"Most guardians choose the energy type that they work best with. Like Cayde-6, he's the hunter vanguard, and he prefers using solar energy over the other two."

I just nodded in a daze. What the hell was I supposed to do with all of this information? I guess it was just something else to accept about this new life. I couldn't stop thinking about the old life that seemed to be flashing through my mind though.

"Arthur, I think I'm ready to meet the vanguard. Then ready for bed..."

Arthur blipped at me to follow him. I walked through the tower with renewed vigor as wonderment filled my core and my mind. The sheer amount of people was asinine. Everyone seemed to be running about, shouting at people to work or just going someplace else. I entered into a room that was full of electronics. Computers lined the walls, which were almost completely hidden. Not enough to hide the terrible paint job though, who the hell painted that place. In front of me was a small staircase that lead down into a sunken area of the floor where a ginormous table sat. Holy shit that room was huge, people moved about, hitting the screens, some people running back and forth talking to the what I assumed were the vanguard, the three people that stood around the table. Looking like someone had just kicked their puppy. That wasn't a good omen at all. I really hope no one died. The robot in the room was the first to greet me.

"Welcome guardian, here is some armor and your room key in the tower."

Cold. Almost to the point of rudeness. The other two barely even glanced my way. They were looking at a map of something in concern. It's like they had something more important to do. Just like before. Okay these random intrusive thoughts were getting annoying as hell. I shook my head and took the package from the machine calling himself Cayde-6. I tried to talk to the other two but they just as quickly brushed me off. I did learn their names after a bit of prodding. Zavala and Ikora. They then sent me up the stairs to the main area, or what I assumed was the main area, for my gun. I was almost disappointed at the lackluster greeting I got, something really terrible must have happened. A quick glance at the weapon barely being held together brought a sigh to my lips. What a shame, they should take better care of these. I shook my head in annoyance, it could be fixed easily. Once again, I stopped. Well, I guess I had some training with guns with the brief glances. I got so wrapped in my thoughts that another memory happened to slip through.

 _"Trainee that is not how You put a weapon together! Don't you know anything? Were you raised under a rock or something?"_

 _I freaked out, I'd never get through this hell._

"Hey, you alright? You're looking pale."

I shook my head. I could barely breath all of a sudden. I just needed to get away somewhere, anywhere but here. I was glad that Arthur was right beside me.

"Let's go see Amanda, see if she can fix the ship to get you out of here for a bit. If not, we can just go back out and wander?"

He offered to me. I nodded and was barely making any noise. As we made our way towards Amanda she informed us we would need to find a warp drive to actually travel with this ship. Arthur looked like he was annoyed. Clearly, I wasn't the only one who needed to rest. Amanda coldly turned her back to us. Okay, someone better have died because this was getting ridiculous. I know that I may be a little different than normal but seriously? My aggravation and frustration reached its peak and I took off sprinting. I had never run as fast as I did then. The wonderment and amazement seemed to completely leave me. Arthur got me back into the ship and we just flew around for a while. I couldn't tell you how much time had passed, I stewed in my thoughts for awhile. I was angry, almost getting an unwelcoming feeling. I slammed my fists into the console area.

"What the fuck is wrong with everyone. It's like there's no fucking life in them. Someone better have fucking died or the world better be ending because that was no way to great someone who is brand new. Who the fuck do they think they are? Fucking shit, that is not fucking okay, at fucking all, damn bastards."

Arthur blinked.

"A guardian should not curse like that..."

I gave him a glare and a mechanical laughter reverberated across the ship's hull. I blinked in confusion which made the little ghost laugh harder. He was joking. Pulling my strings, the little shit. I couldn't help but laugh along with him.

"Thanks for that, Arthur. I needed the laugh!"

Arthur glided down in front of me.

"Your welcome! I wasn't sure if you would be able to tell I was being sarcastic or not."

I gave him a grin.

"I didn't know you knew what sarcasm was!"

He seemed to be ruffled at that.

"Of course!"

We laughed again. The playful banter between easing the tensions of the day and putting our troubled minds at ease. Arthur looked out towards the landscape.

"Do you ever get tired floating around like that?"

Arthur contemplated before giving his answer.

"Not really no."

I smiled a gentle smile.

"Would you like the story of king Arthur now? I may not remember all of it, but I remember most of it."

Arthur chirped and affirmative in unbridled excitement.

"So there was a magical witch, a good one mind you, and she placed a sword into a stone saying whomever pulled the sword out has the qualities of a king and therefore shall become king or something like that. For years people tried with no luck until a poor boy saw that his friend was being beaten around by a guard and looked for anything to fight with. Well he grabbed the sword and pulled. Everyone had stopped around him and bowed. He was then king. His friend turned out to be a great magician that protected him in turn. Arthur was known for his kindness and not one person ever again fell into the grip of being poor in the kingdom. He protected their borders for years until his untimely death at the hands of his jealous son. But, that's all I can remember of the story. I know there was something else with a female involved, but I don't remember it well enough to tell that part."

The ghost blipped happily.

"We should try and find the story in old archives as we explore!"

I cast a sidelong glance at the ghost.

"You really love stories don't ya!"

Arthur seemed to nod his entire frame in agreement.

"So if I'm Arthur you must be the magician in this tale."

I laughed. The way Arthur's mechanical mind worked bemused me to no end.

"I guess that's pretty accurate."

Arthur than tilted his body, I guess he was trying to tilt his head...or lack thereof one.

"So, do you want to fight that archaeon now?"

I nodded my head and sped off looking for a place to land. I'm not sure how I learned to fly the ship, but I'll just pass it of as revival knowledge!

* * *

My first year as a guardian, was met with contempt and anger. Some horrible obnoxious people, I became completely closed off from the rest of the guardians there and did my own thing. I couldn't care what happened to the others at that point. That first day set in motion a horrible path for me to try to traverse alone. Yeah, that wasn't smart. I digress though, I'm going to skip ahead a bit so you don't have to listen to me bitch about my anger.

* * *

Authors Note: This is the first of many updates to the story, with a new chapter towards the end. I believe i wish to wrap this story up and start on a new one. Not sure of what yet but thank you for all your continued support. I'm hoping the updates will be complete within the next few weeks so i can add the last chapters. Don't trust that yet.


	2. Chapter 2

That's how it began, with disappointment, headaches and a lot of confusion. But that is only the beginning of this tale. The world seemed to get darker the more I searched and the more I became in tuned with myself. You know, I never thought I would ever write this story. That my own story would be left untold. I didn't realize that maybe other guardians need someone to rely on. That we were not made equal. That it only seemed that way. That we all went through the same missions, the same storylines of someone else's tale. Until the day one guardian made a terrible discovery. That the hive, had taken over the moon. That was the day I was revived, and it only got worse, but my mind was elsewhere, focused on finding out who I was. The cabal was moving in force, the vex everywhere. It still gives me a headache, but I had no business with that end of the world nonsense. Not directly at least and not at first. I'm going to skip to where instead of me just searching empty buildings for anything that might relate to myself, I found it which set off a chain of events I doubt I could ever prepare for.

* * *

Exploring was my favorite thing. I had been in the forest for days. I loved being outside of the tower. Earth was such a beautiful place. Almost a year had passed since I had been awoken and many things had happened. Way too many things. I was a lone and didn't need anyone. I was happy with just Arthur watching my back and keeping me company.

The Cosmodrone, a place worth exploring to me. Earth had been my home at one point. At least an old version of earth... and not Russia. I looked at the writing below me on the work out book in my hands. Its pages were filled with weird script characters I recognized but couldn't recall their meaning. The world had become so decrypt and barren. I grumbled in annoyance.

"Arthur, why can I still not remember anything but feel like I remember everything?"

Arthur popped out in front of me.

"I'm not sure, most guardians at this point just give up remembering. Though I believe I have found something out but I'm not sure I should tell you. It could be dangerous."

I looked at him in exasperation. He seemed to clear his nonexistent throat and continued.

"I believe you were born well before the golden age, which rarely ever happens as it is, but I believe you born in a time where even space travel was a thing of fantasy. Also, the way you fight, it's almost like you were in a military of some sort. It is possible to know more but I'm not quite sure where the database is. Just a very vague idea of where it might be."

I perked up at this. Arthur just opened up a can of worms and I knew I had to go exploring now. This time maybe even het a hint at who I was. This could just be a wild goose chase, but I need to know.

 _ **"Arthur, I know I'm driving you nuts with how much I keep trying to find out about me. But if in two more years, we find nothing. I will give up this pointless search. Move on and go live a new life."**_

I smiled fondly at the newer memory. That talk had almost happened a year ago. It was after days and days for no sleep and Arthur was concerned after my well-being. I had gotten so crazy for the search that he almost walked out on me. Left me for dead.  
I couldn't lose the little ghost 5hat had become my sole companion, so we came to a compromise we could both deal with. I smiled at him

"I think it's worth exploring. Potentially we could find out why I seem to be different, why I don't quiet belong in this world. I mean we haven't been searching nearly as much anymore. Plus, once you tell me where it is, I won't be able to stop."

I put the old book back down on the shelf unit. Arthur gave me the coordinates, and we left the little hidey hole I had found. I took once glance behind me to see the broken-down furniture, a barely working light and books and maps scattered about everywhere. There was a map that hung on the wall that pictured the entire planet we were on. So far, I had barely gotten through searching Russia. I looked down at the coordinates Arthur had given me. We made our way quickly to an area of Russia I hadn't yet been too. We wound up going to what looked like an abandoned warehouse district. Rusted metal hung from the ceiling, I loaded the hand gun I had found. These warehouses usually had some sort of fallen in them. I poked my head around the corner just barely being able to see what was there. A quick look at my scanner showed nothing. Which was actually unsettling, there was seldom a time where these warehouses were unoccupied. I pulled out my hand canon and quickly made my way through the rusted building. There was debris littered everywhere and over turned computers and servers. A loud sigh escaped my lips.

"Don't be disheartened yet! Were only beginning I'll start searching in the next rooms and send you a message if I find anything."

Arthur really was working hard for me. Even though I know he's against this.

"Thank you...and be careful. Wouldn't want you getting hurt on a fool's errand."

He blipped happily at me and took off. I began searching the numerous computers. The first one I went too had a black screen and wouldn't turn on. Every single one I tried wouldn't respond to me or they didn't have any information relating to before the golden age. It was right when I finished looking at the final computer in the room when a message with directions was sent to me by Arthur. I practically ran through the place not caring about my surroundings. I really should've paid more attention to them. I would have noticed something was very off in the room I had ran into to meet with Arthur.

"I found video files, and something called a pdf file on someone who looks exactly like you it's not much but its downloading to my hard drive. See if you can find anything else about someone named Adrine Davus."

I quickly looked through the books in the room finding a couple with the name in them. I grabbed them and placed them into my storage. I searched through the last computers that Arthur didn't get too and found a little bit more about the girl. I didn't bother reading anything yet. Arthur began to download what I had found when a sharp hissing noise hit my ear. I sucked in my breath and held my gun up.

"Arthur, we need to go... now..."

Arthur blipped at me again.

"Two minutes and I'll have everything."

I grimaced.

"I don't think we have that long."

A figure came into view. Something I had never seen before. It wasn't the taken, it wasn't the cabal or fallen or even hive. I would've taken even the vex over what stood before me. It was almost mechanical in movement but had grace like a dancer. It seemed to be hung over slouched yet standing straight like a soldier. It was a walking contradiction. It eyes glowed blue, it teether were pointed and black, its head was misshapen and had what looked to be its skin hanging in places. It made me want to wretch. And the worst part is how big it was. Its head touched the ceiling and the spikes down its back to the end of its tail were about as tall as I was. What armor it had on was almost like a mail plated full body piece and looked stark silver and out of place on the creature.

"Who are you, what do you want?"

"Morte..."

Its voice rasped and cracked as it spoke that one word. I had never been that scared in this life until that moment. Arthur had acknowledged that he had everything, and we could go, and I ran. Arthur disappearing inside my helmet. In one terrifying second, I realized the damn thing was chasing me. I had no idea what it was, and I didn't want to know, I felt the pounding of my feet hitting the beaten path rhythmically. My breathing became hitched and unsteady.

 _"We have to go!"_

 _I felt myself running through a forest with gunfire close behind, dragging someone along with me. I wasn't sure who it was, but it was someone. My legs had gone numb and my adrenaline was pumping._ _  
_  
I shook my head to clear the intrusive memory and used all of my power to get away. I dipped through the forest running straight through dense trees and brush. That was until I collided with something very solid. Like a wall. I shook my head to clear the stars that had formed.

"How did you find me guardian? You're not supposed to be here."

The mechanical voice of Cayde greeted me. I pulled him down to a crouch, putting my finger to my lips and making a motion for him to look past the brush I had just run through. The creature that had been chasing us ran by. I held my breath for several tense seconds as he passed by the area we were currently in. The creature than moved on back slowly the way that it had come. The alcove that I had ran into had just saved my ass. I looked at Cayde and his exo eyes were wide with shock.

"What in the traveler's name was that thing?"

I shook my head. I was attempting to catch my breath and calm down. Adrenaline was still pumping through my veins, which didn't make it easy to think straight. I realized I just stumbled into Cayde's hiding place like an idiot. Shit.

"I have absolutely no idea. Thanks for letting me hide until that thing had passed."

He nodded.

"I do believe that I can trust you're silence on my hiding place."

I snorted. Well, he did have a right to fear that. He wasn't supposed to be here at all.

"Trust me when I say I have no fucking idea where I am right now. But no, I won't say anything about the place you go to hide from the vanguard."

It felt good to have the tension drain away. Especially from someone who I had rarely talked to. That seemed to be reserved for special guardians who were doing major missions. I was not one of them. I tended to avoid all of the vanguard for fear they would pull me away from my own mission.

"Does everyone know I do that! Oh, come on!"

Cayde sounded exasperated. I laughed a bit at his overdramatic flare. Talk about a drama queen and I thought I was bad.

"Well you do make it obvious that you disappear occasionally. Regardless of that what should we do about that creature?"

He had a large grimace to his face.

"For now let it go. We have enough on our plate with everything else trying to kill us, let's just hope this was a fluke."

I nodded.

"I'm going to head back to the tower. Again, thanks for letting me hide."

He slightly tilted his head at me.

"Anytime guardian, especially if you need an escape again."

I waved and walked into an area to call the ship. Arthur popped out once we boarded. I took us to orbit and set the auto pilot. It would be a couple of hours before I spoke a single word again.

"I'm ready to look at those video files...I think..."

Arthur seemed to look down sadly.

"Some of them... are not nice..."

I nodded. Of course, they weren't, it was if a time long since passed.

"I need to know."

This was the moment I had spent a year looking for and Arthur began the first video. The timestamp read that it was about half an hour in length. The first thing I saw on the screen. A woman in uniform, during some sort of ceremony. It looks as if she had family of some sort on the stage with her. But that wasn't all. What really caused me to look on with morbid fascination a twinge of sadness is that woman looked exactly like me. We were identical in every way. The same voice, the same hair, the same eyes and even the same build. A saw a young girl run up to her and give a hug. The scene switched to some sort of vehicle, almost looked like our ships, and someone's legs sticking out of what looked to be an engine intake.

"Airman Davus, where do you think you're going?"

Davus flipped around and popped her head out.

"Well no one else will touch the damn bird! I'd like my engine clean thank you. It'll be easier when they scope the damn thing."

I laughed. She had my humor. There were a couple of more scenes of her around the aircraft fixing whatever needed to be fixed at the time. The next scene about broke my heart. There was chaos and panic the person who had recorded this was running. The person ran into the house to find it lying in ruins with nothing but ruble and debris everywhere. One tiny arm stuck out from the rubble and the person recording dropped the device she was using I saw Davus come into view, a heart wrenching wail come from her body as she moved the rubble off the little girl. She placed her fingers to her neck and softly whispered. The device still picked it up.

"My daughter...my baby girl..."

She move out of the way of the camera to sit back. She let out an anguished scream. Turning her face up to the sky. A cough was heard in the distance and she went running. Grabbing the device and moving it with her. She moved another large slab of rubble when a man with a bloody beard and face came into view.

"I am sorry Addy...I messed up big time...maybe it's time...I cannot move my body anymore...you know I can't live like this..."

A sob was heard.

"I couldn't save our daughter...I tried so hard, I tried to keep her safe...All I could do was watch on in horror. Forget about me...run... go... Never look back. Remember us."

She grabbed her phone and some rustling was heard. An audible click, the sound of a gun being reloaded, and then silence and dark. The clip had ended. Tears were streaming down my face. Adrine Davus... Who I was, I had no doubt it my mind now. The missing faces and blanks were beginning to fill in enough to know who I was. I knew my name that was a start.

"Arthur...I think I'm good for now..."

He flew us back to the tower silently. No words needed to be said. When we landed and teleported out, I walked dejectedly down the halls of the tower, completely unaware of everything. The walk to the downstairs dormitories was in silence as I processed everything I had seen. A member of the military, judging the uniform, work with mechanics, had a daughter and a husband. All whom seem to have died. My name was Adrine Davus. My name is now storm. I have become a guardian. I walked into the scarcely decorated room. A small bed sat to the left of a window and a small desk sat to the right side of the room. There was nothing else there. I sat down on the bed and the tears flowed freely. I could almost feel the memories, but they didn't seem like mine. I was distraught and uncappable of processing the feelings. I wasn't sure if I was crying from the knowledge I now had or the pain from the loss of those memories. I couldn't really say. Arthur floated in front of me and I barely acknowledged him. I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I couldn't seem to function. I could almost remember everything. I realized now that my year long search had come to the end, and I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. I knew who I was but not all of it because I couldn't bring myself to see more. I didn't want to feel the pain of what had happened again. I flopped into the bed and let darkness take me.

A couple of days had gone by before I left the room again. I was silent as the grave, completely destroyed. I wasn't that person anymore, but I was at the same time. It seemed like the memories I gain back I lose them just as quickly. I went over to a planet named Mars, just to kill something, just to go crazy. I felt like my head was splitting apart. I barely ate or drank. I needed to kill something, needed to destroy something. I went and grabbed some patrols and went crazy. I could tell Arthur was getting worried about me as I had not used my gun once. Only my fists and my knife. I felt their darkened blood spray across my face and I grinned and laughed. The first cabal I had stabbed through the eye, when the second rounded behind me. I dodged backward slicing into the second one's neck. The third one was an interesting kill in my eyes. I had run up the wall and sent my blade right through his skull. My vision went completely red. Cabal after cabal I slaughtered. Moving efficiently with my blade, slicing and piercing everything in sight. A hand had grabbed mine.

"What the hell are you doing guardian?"

I was still seeing red and attacked the titan in front of me in rage. This person was smart enough to avoid my attack and pin me to the ground efficiently. I tried to escape his grasp.

"Breath, it's okay, you got them all."

I began to follow his words as he instructed me to take deep cleansing breaths. My vision cleared.

"What...Who?"

Amber colored eyes stared at me.

"I'm Raphael, a titan. And a guardian like yourself."

I nodded. Kind thrown for a loop, not fully understanding.

"I'm storm..."

After I had realized what he had just witnessed my face went red as a tomato. I quickly clambered out from under him.

"I'm so sorry you had to see that... I wasn't myself."

He just laughed and stood up.

"We all have bad days, just try not to at it alone next time. Do you have a clan?"

I stared at him like he had two heads.

"What's a clan?"

His face contorted into an amused smirk as he began to bellow out his laughter. I stood there staring at him as his own hysterics had calmed down. I just stared after him.

"Geez, clearly you've been a guardian for a while and still don't know?"

I shook my head and he sighed with a smile.

"A clan is a group of people who do missions together and make sure no one dies for real. We raid and do missions that are too hard for one person. Come I'll introduce you to everyone else. I'm on my way to the meeting spot."

I looked at him with a sideways glance.

"You're meeting spot is in a hostile environment?"

He laughed again.

"There are parts of mars that even the cabal can't get too."

I nodded as we went down a barren tunnel that had seemed to be imbedded into the rock. It was almost unnoticeable. A group of about ten stood in the area.

"Raph your late buddy!"

I could hear him sigh in annoyance as I stood silently next to him.

"Sorry, ran into someone needing assistance so... Meet storm!"

The ten guys all raised their eyebrows.

"Where'd you find this chick?"

I held my breath.

"Murdering cabal. Figured we could use someone that's not scared to get their hands dirty!"

"Is this true?"

This man was another hunter, but bulkier and definitely powerful.

"Yes...sir..."

My voice sounded broken. Cracked from disuse. I didn't want them to know that I had gone a little crazy, but to them it was apparently an asset.

"Well, we will see but for now, I'm BlueRex but everyone calls me Rex. The other guys are: Rhods, Dimi, Crete, Gad, Frank, DevilDance, Burns, Texas, and Littles."

Red pointed at each member of the group. I would never remember them all.

"Welcome to Untold Stories"

A smile slowly appeared on my face.

"Thank you."

The meeting continued with them going over the different missions of the week and how they would hit the raid.

"We have enough for two parties."

They looked at me.

"This will be your test. Beat the raid with one of our groups and you have a permanent place with us."

I nodded.

"I'll do it."

* * *

This was setting up to be an interesting experience I would never forget. I still remember it fondly. I knew I couldn't run from my past forever, but it was a nice distraction. For a little while that is, but it opened into something much bigger that I would have never thought to happen.

* * *

 _ **Authors Note: Well Chapter 2 is done, Chapter 3 is done just needs editing and Ch. 4 is being written. It seems like each chapter is anywhere from 2000-4000 words depending on my mood. I was planning on making this shorter than its turning out to be, apparently, I'm in a very writing mood. This I kind of predictable but I'm enjoying the story I'm weaving so oh well. Please leave a review and thanks for reading my story 😊**_


	3. Chapter 3

That first raid was something I could never forget. I think that's what caused me to fear jumping from heights. I must have fallen half a dozen times. Seriously, Arthur still hangs that over my head. It's a little ridiculous if I may add. Though that raid created a friendship that lasted a couple of months. Short, I know, but it wasn't any one's fault...but I get into that story at a later point. It had been a week since I met Raph.

* * *

I had been wandering the tower bored, just waiting to get on with the raid later that night. I was way too restless, I couldn't relax. My frustration was high, I wanted to know more about myself but could bring myself to watch anything else about Davus. Arthur wisely kept it from me. I should've known better than to request more, he knew it had changed me for a while, that I had lost myself in this search instead of letting the memories come to me on its own time. Somehow, I had managed to wander into the hangar and all but fell into Holliday. I don't know why I'm such a klutz when my mind is wandering but I am.

"I'm sorry! I wasn't paying attention."

Holliday looked at me.

"All good, I'm just late trying to fix ships again. No reliable help round here."

She practically growled out. I got an urge in my heart almost like an invisible force pulling me. I just had to work on these ships. I knew exactly what to do. All of the memories concerning aircraft came back to me and I lost my breath. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of me all of a sudden, but I still replied.

"I could help out until tonight. I have nothing better to do."

She smiled casting me a sidelong glance like I might not be that much help. I didn't blame her. I barely knew where the knowledge came from, but I was grateful that it came back to me at that moment.

"Good you can fix the ship Cayde decided to go on a joy ride in. Talk to the tech next to the ship and he'll help you get started. I've got to work some emergency sparrow cases."

Nodding, I went to the ship she had been pointing at. One look told me the entire engine mounted harness was busted. It's what dampened the vibrations to the cockpit in order to make it less of a headache to fly but, it was important since without it, the ship would fall apart from the vibrations. I made my way over to the tech warily since his workstation was a huge mess.

"I'm here to help. Holliday sent me by as an extra set of hands."

The tech looked up and scoffed. His coveralls were filthy, and he looked pissed off that he had work today or something.

"I don't need it... The ships finished, and you're just a guardian. You can't fix any of this."

I twitched my eyebrow in annoyance. What did me being a guardian have to do with helping? He clearly didn't like what he was doing.

"Not to be rude or anything but most of this shit cosmetic, it's just the engine mounting harness that's broken, and since that is you won't get an engine start. It's a safety feature."

The tech stared at me almost in a menacing way and threw the pad he was holding at me. I caught it luckily. Geez what is with these people? I get they may be a little jealous of us guardians but that doesn't mean they should be rude.

"If you're so smart you fix it, I'm going on break."

I stared after this fellow. Seriously confused. What the hell had just happened? He clearly didn't give a shit about his job.

"Well that's new."

Arthur popped out behind me.

"You're telling me, well we have work to do now...a lot of it... This is supposed to be a two-man job, mind helping me out a bit with this?"

Arthur blipped in agreement as we headed to the back of the ship. Images flashed before my mind as an old plane came into mind.

 _"It's the engine harness, it won't start without it. That's what the seals are for. And to top it off its not exactly in one piece it's in three. We should scrap the engine cann a harness from another jet and fix it that way."_ _  
_  
The images flashed into my mind as I grabbed the toolbox that had been left out. The techs tools were scattered every which way around the ship, so I began to collect them. One by one, the process didn't take very long but I made sure I had every tool that was supposed to be in the box. Luckily inside there was a cutout of where everything should have been, made my job a hell of a lot easier.

 _"Tool accountability is important, I lost tool could equal a downed jet, these things are important to remember. The jets are sensitive."_

I grabbed one of the wrenches labeled 7/16 and began to work. Heading to the back of the ship, I sighed looking around from something I could use to hoist the engine finding one not to far away from me.

 _"Housekeeping is another thing to keep in mind, it'll help keep everything in one place and you won't lose anything that way. Makes the jobs go by faster!"_ _  
_  
I felt tears running down my face as I slowly worked at the harness. The bolts where pretty rusted and old, the engine was burn but useable. The parts were all at my finger tips and I was in auto pilot. Arthur seemed to huddle next to me for support. I smiled at him. My soul was mourning for itself. I now had a way to satiate the memories, something I remembered on my own, like it was engrained into muscle memory. Two hours had gone by and it seemed like no time at all. I just had started bolting the engine back in, starting from the inside when a very familiar voice caught up to me.

"Guardian, what are you doing to my ship?"

I quickly widened my eyes and flipped around poking my head out. Well, there goes my peace and quiet.

"Fixing it?"

Cayde shook his head in disbelief.

"Where's the tech that was here?"

I laughed very dryly annoyance pouring from my voice. Engine mounts really are a two-person job. Too bad I did it alone.

"He took off a couple of hours ago, I took his place, so you could use the ship again. He was gunna trash it."

Cayde went wide eyed almost looking at the ship as if it was a person.

"Well, he better not have hurt her, I just won her in a bet! Anyway, where's Holliday?"

I shook my head and went back inside the engine to finish my work.

"No idea, I'll be another twenty to thirty minutes if you want to hang around."

Cayde had come around to the back of the engine to hear me better as I made my way back inside the cramped space.

"Sounds like a plan, so how do you know how to fix these things?"

I laughed again.

"No idea, just do."

I fitted the last bolt torqueing it down and slid out of the tube. Cayde seemed to almost look solemnly off in the distance. I passed it off as nothing but his mind wandering and cleaned up my tools.

"Just the ops check left!"

I moved everything from behind the jet and put up the guards. I than pushed the button for the noise shield dome. Supper useful tool wish I had one back then, probably would've saved some hearing loss. I placed some ear protection on and motioned for Cayde to do the same. Though I guess for him it would be shutting down is audio features. Lucky shit. No one he pretends not to listen. I clambered up into the driver's seat and started her up, ran the engine at full throttle for ten minutes and then shut her down.

"She's all fixed other than cosmetically, but that's gunna take longer."

Holliday chose this time to walk up to us and Cayde seemed to almost gravitate to her. I giggled at the two of them, they were flirting with each other. That's when Holliday noticed I was still here.

"Guardian? I thought the tech said we were trashing this and he sent you back?"

I heaved a sigh of annoyance.

"It was just the engine harness he left like two and a half hours ago, ships fixed now, really didn't take that long."

Holliday had anger in her eyes.

"One of my techs left you alone? On a two-man job none the less? While I'm impressed and glad you're good with mechanics, that was not okay. Specially considerin for all he knew it was your first time?"

She faltered at the end of her sentence when she saw the looks both Cayde and I were giving her. I smiled and Cayde grinned. Almost at the same time we shared a sentence.

"You may want to rethink how you said that"

Holliday blushed, and we were thrown into peels laughter. After the past couple of weeks, it was worth it. Holliday then checked my work still blushing.

"Damn this is a great job you did. I wouldn't have figured it out this fast. When did you work on ships before."

 _"An award is presented to sergeant Davus, in recognition and honor that she has gone above and beyond in her work and has pathed the way to a new beginning and a new era of maintenance..."_

I smiled a melancholy smile.

"A long time ago."

Cayde looked over in concern. Almost a recognition in his eyes, in such a way that unnerved me. I wasn't sure what I did to deserve that look, but I recognized what it might be.

 _ **"What do you mean exos can't remember their past every time they get downloaded into a new body?"**_

 _ **I asked Arthur curious of someone else having issues. The memory thing was an obsession apparently.**_

 _ **"It's like losing data, after time the memories just fade away. It's called DER. Not something you have but its similar, maybe ask around and see what they have done to try and keep memories or find lost ones?"**_

 _ ****_Amanda's voice brought me back from Arthurs explanation from my hunt during the past year.

"Well, you're more than welcome down here anytime if you need to get anything off your mind. I could use a worker like you!"

Cayde looked at Holliday.

"Don't go stealing my hunters now!"

Holliday gave him a look, one that's hard to define, maybe exasperation.

"You're not there for your hunter so why not!"

I sat there and watched them bicker again. Geez they loved to go at it.

"STORM YOU DOWN HERE?"

A familiar voice called out.

"Over here Raph!"

He walked towards us looking at the two bickering and not paying attention.

"What are you doing?"

I laughed and moved away from the two caught up in their argument.

"Helping Holliday fix shit. Time to go?"

He nodded and led the way as we left the two arguing behind not bother saying goodbye. Clearly this was foreplay for them and I shook my head. Arthur went back inside my helmet as we continued on our way to where the rest of the clan stood.

The way to the raid I was brought up to speed on what was going on. As we approached the first obstacle I became very silent, quietly following instructions until we had to jump. I have never died so many damn times by jumping. Arthur was getting annoyed the clan was laughing and I was just embarrassed. Needless to say, when we got to the boss. I was pretty pissed, it didn't take much for me to go crazy on the vex. I just killed everything in sight. I wanted to hear there screams as I came at them I wanted them to feel the pain and heartache I had been feeling. I took the first one and crushed in my hands ignoring the pain I felt. My knife went through the next two. Only when their damn boss came out did I switch to my weapons. I jumped up into a corner to snipe the guy as my team mates went in for close support. I felt my activation sequence of my golden gun and let loose shooting from across the map. It felt good watching their boss fall with my last shot. I breathed a sigh of relief. It was done. I had completed my first raid. And the gear that had been stashed around definitely helped out a lot. I felt almost invincible but so vulnerable at the same time. Ralph and Rex looked at me.

"Welcome to stories untold!"

They handed me a clan cape right then and there. I sent them a small smile.

"Thank you. So now what?"

The smiled.

"We head back to the tower. Hang out, do patrols strikes, whatever. Until the next raid in a week."

We all got back and parted ways. We met, raided, and dispersed so quickly I had whiplash, I need some breathing room, so I headed straight for the forest just needing to be out of the confines of the tower. We landed in a wooded area and I sat down on the door to my ship.

"Hey Arthur, I'm ready to see more. I'm a little more prepared this time."

Arthur hesitated.

"How about we start a new file, hopefully some happy memories come up?"

I nodded not want to see too much of myself. I really wanted to try and remember on my own terms, which slowly was happening day by day. For a year I was so desperate so passionate and now, I almost didn't want to know. I needed to know though, I didn't want to feel like I wasn't me.

Arthur transported a screen like the pad I used for the engines to me and I smiled gratefully. I really didn't want to sit in the ship too long. I quickly made my way so the only thing to my back was a tree. I sat down and placed the tablet onto my lap. The first video that was pulled up was only thirty minutes long. It began with the young girl, my daughter, running around with a party hat on. She was smiling, there was no audio to the video but none the less it looked like her birthday. As the camera panned a sign was hung up on the wall that said "Happy 7th Birthday". It looked like a deck of cards. For each letter there was a different card, it was pretty neat actually. It cut off after that and then showed herself and the same man who died holding each other's hands getting married. I was in a beautiful blueish colored dress. And the man was in a red tux. Interesting color choice. My heart fluttered as the emotions and feelings came back to me, I was soon lost in my own memory of the time.

 _I stood next to him, smiling and leaned my head in._

 _"I'd say you're a looker but..."_

 _I laughed at the man._

 _"You are ridiculous my love."_

 _He placed his hand on my stomach._

 _"Yeah but so will he be."_

 _I shook my head._

 _"You don't even know if it'll be a boy."_

 _He smiled._

 _"Oh it will be and I'll name him..."_

I got jogged out of the memory by gunfire. It was on the screen. This time though, it wasn't me, it was him. He was a soldier as well. That was new to me. He was fighting in a trench of some sort being almost aloof in nature. The screen turned red. A loud alarm starting blipping and Arthur's eye was red.

"What the fuck? Arthur?"

I scrambled to try and figure out what was going on. Nothing I did was helping even trying to turn off the tablet. Nothing I did was working and I felt helpless, lost and alone again. Arthur was still, a slight blue electrical charge coursing over him, almost frozen in time. It arched out at me every time I tried to touch him. I was at a loss of what to do.

* * *

That day went from good to interesting to bad in a matter of seconds. I was terrified, I still am when I remember it. To this day, I am very fearful that it will happen again. I know it won't, but I still protect Arthur very adamantly because of it. I never let him out of my sight for more than a moment anymore. Though this was the moment I stopped searching for answers, it was the only good thing to come out of this whole crazy nonsense.

* * *

Authors Note: Holy crap! Thank you all so much for the support of my story! I really wanted to wait to post this chapter but I finished editing it tonight so I'm staying awake waaaaaayyyy longer than I should to get this to you guys! Please remember to leave a comment, it helps keep me going when I write!


	4. Chapter 4

I wish I could say that was a fond memory of my ghost, but it's not, I thought I had lost Arthur. I became very quickly attached from then on. I always protected him from then on. We never downloaded anything ever again. I was scared that day. Terrified. I didn't want to lose him...

* * *

I slammed on every button I could see, I tried everything. I was going crazy. I couldn't lose him. He had become a dear friend. Machine or not. I tried the last thing I could think of. I reached out at him and was jolted back away into the wall of the ship and he fell to the ground. My vision slowly faded as I kept my eyes trained on him and the last thing I saw was another ghost flitting its way over to him.

What I opened my eyes to was something unexpected. There was Cayde. Watching over me. How the he'll did he know where I was? How did anyone for that matter? He must have snuck out of the tower but how did he know I was in trouble?

"You okay guardian."

I bristled. I hated being called that.

"My name's storm, stop calling me that."

He looked taken aback. Guess he never really saw my snippiness at the tower.

"Excuse me then, you okay?"

I nodded before regaining my senses as to what happened. I began to panic.

"Where's Arthur? Is he okay? what happened to him?"

I practically smacked my head into Cayde's as I sat up freaking out.

"I'm here, but I lost all that data...there was a virus, embedded into that file. Ut was meant to capture ghosts... And make them easy to destroy."

I breathed a sigh of relief as his voice reached my ears.

"I don't care about the data, as long as your safe."

The ghost seemed to perk up at that.

"Well I'm still sorry."

I shook my head.

"That creature was laying a trap..."

I shivered, almost fearful what would have happened if we opened those files up there. We both would have died. We wouldn't be around to share our stories any more.

"Well isn't this a happy family moment."

I blinked and through my head back laughing.

"Well, this is an odd day, I've run into you twice now. I seemed to avoid you for the better part of a year, your ruining my rep!"

I gave a fake pout it was odd to run into him so much.

"It's not my fault you just happen to be where I am, but this time your ghost called me."

I shot Arthur a look.

"You called the vanguard...because I passed out?"

Arthur seemed to shrug, or what you would call shrugging for a ghost.

"It's not like I had anyone else on your call list."

I growled at my stupidity for being a lone for a year. Sometimes I could kick myself.

"How'd you even manage to get a call out?"

Arthur seemed to flit in response.

"I noticed something was off and quickly sent an SOS to Cayde with coordinates before I froze."

Smart ghost. Very clever.

"Arthur was telling me, you're having severe memory problems..."

Once again, I glared at Arthur.

"What he could help!"

I sighed giving into to the willful ghost. Of course, he would bring it up when I was unconscious. What better time to do so when I couldn't shut his mouth.

"Yeah...ever since I woke up a year ago. And I know memory loss is normal, but I couldn't remember my name, now I remember more with the help of those files. Now, I'll have to remember on my own, but I have a basis to go on. It should be more fun this way, I hope. I'm okay though, I've come to terms with it."

The exo sat back.

"Well this is no place to talk. I'd like to hear more, it may help me as well."

I took a moment to consider it and nodded my head. I stood up and brushed some first off my armor and looked toward Cayde.

"Follow me. My hide out isn't too far from here."

I guided us through the forest feeling nauseous and uneasy. For the first time I felt nervous, like I was making a huge mistake by sharing my secret to someone. I guess I would just have to deal with it, I needed to trust someone. One thing I could add to the list of shit I need to work on. Being a people person. Arthur had been begging me for months to open up to someone other than him, what better person than the vanguard himself. He did have years and years of knowledge that could help me. As we rounded the corner for my own little stow away I felt jumpy. On edge, what the he'll was wrong with me? My mind kept slipping back to having a husband and a child. I knew they were important to me at one point. Why did Cayde remind me of him. Was it the personality? Maybe it was just because he's the only person I've said more than a sentence too.

"Hey stranger, what's for dinner?"

I smiled and looked at the man.

"Don't know just winging it."

He grabbed me around my waist.

"You know all never forget you or baby girl right?"

I swung around to look at him.

"What brought this on?"

He looked completely nervous but was claimed up.

"Kayden, you tell me right now or no dinner."

He grimaced.

"Can we talk later? After she's asleep?"

I looked at him, really looked at him, he was tired, and he looked stretched thin. He had bags under his eyes and his normal cheery demeanor was gone.

"Storm!"

A voice shook me from a memory as we entered my hideaway, were I proceeded to walk straight into a wall. I fell back on my ass and turned a brought red. Well, I knew my husband's name now. Maybe that's why Cayde reminded me of him. Similar names. Kayden. I smiled as my face was still red as a tomato.

"Well, that was surprising..."

Arthur was chuckling.

"What was that about?"

Cayde asked. My smile changed to a somber, melancholy expression.

"A memory... Every time I remember I get lost in it like it's re happening in front of me."

Cayde looked concerned.

"That shouldn't happen. All guardians either completely forget, somewhat remember or remember all, but it's not encompassing like that. I've never heard of that before."

I nodded.

"I know it's why I just have decided to stay alone all this time...well until today."

He replied quickly.

"Arthur told me you joined a clan finally."

I nodded.

"That's good, more the merrier as the saying goes!"

I laughed at him before taking a more somber tone.

"Cayde... I had a child and a husband... And I'm not sure how the fuck to feel about that. I was in the military, a sergeant, someone that a person looked up to and gave orders. He was in the military. Our daughter died when a building collapsed on her. He must have died as well but I left him behind to escape. It was a war I think. Something horrible happened. I believe we were fighting about something. I don't know what I just got the glimpse of it when we came in here. It's still fuzzy at times but then there are times I act on instinct and its like it never left. At the tower I knew mechanics. It's because of these memories that I know how. I worked on old ships...aircraft if you will. I don't know what time period they were from. They almost looked like ours but without space travel involved and slower. I don't think that was a thing yet. It may have been starting but... I don't know what to do with this. I'm scared, sad and all around freaked out by it."

I ran my mouth, it was like once I started I couldn't stop. Cayde remained silent while I went on and on. By the end of my rant tears were flowing freely down my face. Arthur came up to me and perched on my shoulder for support, a trait I was glad he had. Cayde put his hand in my other shoulder.

"As an exo, I understand, I had a wife and son, I think, but I'm not really sure."

He smiled.

"Sometimes I get flashes and there so intense I need to write them down. I found this journal when I woke as a guardian, so I continued to write to ace, my child. It was the thing to keep me going."

Tears were still present in my eyes.

"How long have you been a guardian?"

A sad smile was drawn on his face.

"Too long sometimes but, it's worth it. Its why I smile, because some one must."

I wiped the tears of my face and gave a big grin.

"Never thought of using humor as a tool to deal with the shit of the world. "

We sat in that comfortable silence for a while.

"I need to get back before Zavala has a fit that I'm not at the last meeting of the night."

He stood visibly deflated.

"Why are you even the vanguard if you hate it so much?"

He laughed.

"I lost a bet."

With that he sauntered of waving his hand cannon around as a goodbye. Arthur moved into my field of vision.

"I told you talking about it would help!"

I glared at him wiping tears from my eyes.

"Yes, but the vanguard? Really?"

He seemed to bristle at my question.

"The only contact you have besides Amanda, Zavala, and Ikora and Rex. I didn't think you wanted any of them to know."

I growled in response knowing he was right of course. Zavala's interests aligned with that of the speaker and the city. Ruling with a very strict hand. Ikora was hard for me to approach. I didn't understand her. One-minute, she's gung hi and the next she sits back and watch. Rex was still someone new. I didn't trust him quiet yet. Damn the ghost and his thoughtfulness.

"Your right..."

The ghost blipped happily and moved into a different position.

"We are staying here tonight?"

I nodded as I set the door code. I didn't want to go back to the tower or sleep in the ship. This would do well enough as it had previously. I grabbed the blanket from the shelf and laud down on the makeshift bed. Within seconds, I had fallen asleep.

For the next few months I fell into an easy routine, once a week I'd get with the clan to raid, then go do patrols as some bounties. I even started picking up matches in the crucible. Occasionally I have a sit down with Ralph over a drink and wed chat. He was the only one I had found approachable. Rex terrified me, and Ralph was the first one to really talk to me. After a while the other guys caught on and they all would sit down fir drinks. We became fast friends that way. We wound up doing crucible matches that send us into fits of giggles on the coms. Usually ending with someone trying a stupid stunt. On my off time I'd either go into the hangar to work or go to my hideout. It was like clockwork. My routine got pretty boring. Until Zavala asked me on a mission.

"Guardian, we have a mission for you and your fireteam."

He approached right as I was taking a drink. I about spit out my drink pretty much directly at him. Zavalla never asked for missions from me. He'll wed barely spoken.

"What is it?"

He looked seriously concerned.

"Radio silence has been broken, on Phobos. Something of a full-fledged assault could be on our way, the vanguard wants you to check it out."

I stared after him.

"Why me? You've never asked me to do missions this entire time I've been here, so why now?"

Zavala looked almost ashamed but hid it well.

"I've been informed of your talent as a guardian by some clanmates of your and they said you'd be good on the front lines."

I immediately shot a glance there way and Raph put his hands up in surrender.

"I have no problem doing so but I'd like to hear the details before I agree."

Zavala nodded.

"Come to the brief room at 1300 and I will fill you in there."

He stalked off as I sighed. What a damn headache. I turned back to the clan.

"Really? Guys? Seriously? You know I stay away from end of the world stuff!"

They laughed.

"Hey, it should be fun!"

Raph said.

"It'll be me you and Raph for this mission."

Of course, Little's was being ridiculous. I sighed again.

"And I'm leading this merry band huh?"

They both said yes in unison.

"Hell..."

We all laughed together as the time quickly approached. We all left the cafe together and made our way to the briefing room. When we entered Zavala, Ikora and surprisingly Cayde was there. We were immediately handed briefing packets and I quickly skimmed through it. Apparently, our out post on Phobos had begun transmitting. Which was not a good sign. That was there as a contingency plan, something was coming. It was our job to scope it out and report back. Seemed easy, which made me very nervous. As we took off, Zavala reiterated our briefing. I was an unbridled bundle of nerves. As we landed we looked at cabal ship was taking off, seemingly running away.

"Um... Where are they going?"

I shook my head in response. I immediately went into silent mode to concentrate. I seemed to get like this a lot just, so I was aware of that, that was going around of me.

"Hey Zavala, the cabal are running?"

Zavala's response almost made me laugh.

"Then shoot em."

We moved forward investigating as we went. We rounded a corner to see something I had not seen before. Only blackness that looked like galaxies swallowing up the cabal.

"What the fuck was that?"

I was freaked the fuck out, Raph got on the coms quickly to relay this info. We fought our way through, with black shadowy cabal coming out if there.

"The mission is scrubbed get out of there."

Zavala didn't need to tell me twice. As we ran little's let out a scream. He was grabbed by the inky blackness. I couldn't tell who was screaming louder. I couldn't even tell I was screaming Raph grabbed him and got pulled with him. Silence other than my scream assaulted my ears. I shook myself out of the pictures running through my head. I ran through the place running into a large room where I was greeted by Oryx. I giant shadow god.

"Your light will be mine."

I could hear Cayde and Zavala on the coms, but I couldn't process what happened. Why did they take them? I ran as fast as I could as Arthur got me back on to the ship I ran straight into the wall putting myself in a blissful state of unconsciousness.

When I next woke I was in the medical wing. There was a lot of chatter around, but I couldn't make out the words. I kept my eyes close and focused on the voices.

"It's been a week. We need to get steal Croats soul. We need an ascendant hive."

That was Eris voice.

"I understand that but you're asking her to go on the dreadnaught when she is stills suffering from emotional trauma of losing her friend. That's why they say she hasn't woken! She doesn't do end if the world stuff! Have Rex go! He already knows the place from putting the beacon on!"

That was Ikora.

"I understand that but Rex... He's not well, he's tried to commit suicide twice after losing four more of his guys. The other three have retired they're guardian ship and no one else will take the job. We need her."

Everyone in the room had gone silent. My clan was gone. Disbanded just like that. With barely anyone left.

"How about let sleeping beauty decide? You can wake up now."

Damn, Cayde saw through me. I guess I wasn't as still as I had hoped. Maybe it was their voices that finally pulled me from unconsciousness.

"My clans gone..."

Cayde nodded while the others in the room looked guilty. I took a deep breath. Barely a year had gone by. It was fun, great. I'd be fine. At least Rex was around I wasn't completely alone. I knew I had a lot to go through, but I couldn't. I directed my thoughts back to the mission.

"And you want me to steal Croats soul to go fight Oryx? Alone?"

Cayde finally steeped in. Grimacing.

"No not alone, just get into Oryx's realm and place a transmat beam."

I nodded. That was a horrible idea really. Did anyone really expect that to work. Cayde clearly didn't.

"I'll do it, just give me a day to get my strength back...and food. Lots of food."

I would think on their deaths later, I had a job to do to keep our city safe. Even thought it was never really my job in the first place. I owed it to my clan. I needed to justify this to myself.

"You need to learn how to compartmentalize your emotions in a deployment setting. You may lose your friends your colleagues. But you must remember the bigger picture."

I shook my head and tried to stand on shaky legs. As I was falling Ikora caught me. Smiling up at her I shook my head.

"Thanks, sorry about that."

She shook her head in understanding.

"It's to be expected after a week of sleeping."

I laughed.

"Guess I needed it or something, could do well with a role in sleeping beauty!"

Cayde laughed.

"Well since she's my hunter I'll take her to the spicy ramen shop."

Zavala and Ikora rolled their eyes. This was the first time I had ever seen them so, open to each other. It was like a front the put on in the command room but behind closed doors they were all just people doing a job. It brought a smile to my face knowing that. I had thought them all so highly and almost feared their power, I forget their guardians first. On a fire team. Of course, they're friends. Probably the best of friends. Cayde seem to waggle his, metal eyebrows? It was directed at Ikora. She sighed in exasperation giving him a slight smile.

The way to the ramen shop was extremely slow going. I was still sore and achy trying to walk with Cayde's help. To top that off the stares of pity I was getting were quite annoying. I was mumbling under my breath by the tine Cayde and I got there. I get it. Not everyone loses their whole clan in a week but, shit happens. The pity was making it hard not to think about them. I stared to choke up but quickly re directed my attention to Cayde.

"You know if you don't want to hang around I can make it back myself. You have no duty to help me."

Cayde looked taken aback.

"What if I wanted ramen?"

He seemed to whine. I blinked staring at him before throwing my head back and laughing.

"You wanted an excuse to leave Zavala and Ikora's glorious company again?"

He cleared his throat.

"Yes, yes I did!"

He seemed to turn his nonexistent nose up as he ordered food. I choose the simplest bowl as I had not eaten in a week. Plain soba noodles would do just fine!

"So, what really happened to them, my clan, I mean technically it's just Rex and I left, but I have to know."

I shoved soba noodles in my mouth as Cayde started to explain to me what had happened. Some of them lost their ghosts to the taken. The others were taken themselves. I barely comprehended the words he was telling me. It was like they just up and disappeared. Some of them I didn't know very well but they were still my clan. I was shaking by the time he finished giving me the details.

* * *

It's hard to remember that time. I was more broken after Cayde had told me what happened. I really couldn't comprehend after months of the mundane and content life I had built all gone with an instant. I knew it was going to change everything. I knew something else was going to happen. I just didn't know what. I really wish I knew that this was just the beginning.

* * *

Author's note: I wasn't planning on getting this out for a while. Thanks for staying with this! I've been a little busy with forsaken. I'm freaking out over a couple of the lore things that I have found. I don't know if it's right or not but, head canon now. When I do get to the forsaken story line, SPOILER ALERT DON'T READ ON. I will be killing Cayde… but there is a way to bring him back and I plan on exploiting that!


	5. Chapter 5

Authors Note: THANK YOU FOR THE AMAZING SUPPORT! I can't thank you everyone enough fro reading my stories. I know there are still a lot of errors and i do plan on going back and fixing them once this story is completed. FOR THIS CHAPTER: This is a warning for this chapter it goes in depth to some very deep issues. Very very deep and serious issues.

* * *

I'm stupid for thinking I could compartmentalize death. While its fine for battle it's only a temporary state. It was a way to keep you from getting killed not for avoiding the problem all together. I wasn't in the middle of a battle, I just was waking up from one. it was then that Cayde did something unexpected, something I would have never guessed at the time. He practically dragged me into the hangar, where I used the bubble shield once and used that same bubble shield as a source of quiet for me to let out everything I had been feeling. Stupid thoughtful robot...

* * *

I screamed and cried, completely breaking down, I shouldn't have asked what had happened but at the same time I was glad I knew. I mean no one wants to hear that their friends were torn apart or taken, but it gave me closure. Those That were ripped apart by the hive: Dimi, Crete, Gad and Frank; and those that were taken: Rhods, DevilDance, Burns and Texas; all etched into my heart forever. Maybe I could still save and protect some of them in my heart that way. Honor their memory by living for them. Maybe even find those that were taken and get them back, if at all possible. That little bit of hope would keep me going. I wanted all of them back. Rex didn't tell anyone what really happened but, it was clear that he was broken by it. I felt broken by it. I could stop think of town I had just lost everyone I had truly been friends with. Cayde sat down next to me at some point and began to hum. It was a soft sweet-sounding bluegrass song. It was sad and hopeful. It was comforting really.

 _"I'm sorry for your loss."_

 _I stood with two flags in my hand, one for my baby girl and the other for my husband. The caskets in front of me were empty. They couldn't retrieve the bodies from our house. It was crumbled and burning when they got to it. There wouldn't have been anything left so they didn't bother searching it would be a wasted effort at that point. I had no words at that, I wanted something. Something to hold onto instead of floating in the black only abyss that seemed to house my thoughts. I flinched at the sounds of the guns going off and as a bugle player played taps the caskets were lowered. A two-star general approached me._

 _"Sergeant, I know you don't want to talk to a crusty old general like me but, I have a bit of a preposition for you."_

 _I turned to him and nodded words not finding me now. If a general was approaching me, it might be the distraction I needed._

 _"We have some new...uh... Machines that need a good mechanic. Would you be interested?"_

 _"Yes sir."_

 _That was barely my voice, but it was there._

 _"There's a catch though..."_

 _I looked up at him._

 _"What..."_

 _He gave a devilish smile._

 _"It's classified."_

A hand reached out and touched my shoulder. At some point I had collapsed in on myself. Alright, I think I got most of what I needed to out of my system for now. I couldn't let myself think, I had a job to do, a mission to complete. I sat up off the floor and dried my tears.

"Thank you... again. I keep using you for comfort it seems like."

He gave a goofy grin.

"Well not everyone is as dashing and handsome as I!"

I burst out laughing. Dear lord, what a frigen peacock!

"With an ego to boot!"

I smiled gently. He was always joking, always laughing, sometimes him just being there to crack jokes was distraction enough.

"You were trapped in a memory again, weren't you?"

I looked over shocked. How the hell... Did he know that?

"How'd you know."

He adjusted his position on the floor.

"You got silent all ova sudden."

I nodded. I guess I do get distracted when those memories happen. I must have gone from screaming to silent in an instant. Damn I'm so weird.

"It was of the funeral for my husband and child after they passed away. They're bodies were never found, so empty caskets."

He grimaced.

"Well, at least they are in piece now, watching over you from somewhere jealous at your new chance of life."

I smiled.

"From what I know about him he would be ranting and raving about how I'm the best and I deserve it blah blah blah..."

Cayde stood up and offered me a hand.

"Sounds like a damn good man, wish I knew thus person, would've gotten along great I'm sure! But, before Amanda gets on us for misuse of her equipment we should go."

I stared at him.

"When have you cared about things like that?"

He beamed.

"Oh I don't, but you might."

I paled thinking about her temper. Shit he got me there. Loved the placed too much to make Amanda angry. He offered his hand to me.

"Touché my friend...touché."

I took his hand and stood. We slowly made our way back to my apartment.

"Thank you. I know your busy with other hunters, so thanks for giving me your time"

He laughed.

"Well your one of my favorites since you prefer solar energy! Don't need to be all polite ya know. It's weird... Stop it."

I laughed along with him.

"Goodnight Cayde. Oh, what time's the briefing so I can set an alarm."

He looked flustered and flailed a bit.

"In an hour..."

My jaw dropped. We had been out all night and into the morning. What the hell. Where'd the damn time go. I shook my head, I had gotten zero rest. I am a dumbass. A certifiable dumbass.

"Arthur think you can heal the damage to my sleep over ridden body?"

He popped out looking like I had woken him. Oops.

"Yeah just give me a moment to get my shit together."

I giggled. After a moment I felt refreshed and able to move fully. So damn much better.

"Let me uh...change I'll be right out."

He nodded, and I closed the door quickly grabbing my spare armor and guns putting on fresh clothes. It took only ten minutes but that was just because of all the armor. Now I needed to know why the healing wasn't done earlier. I was practically a rag doll the entire day...night...both... Whatever.

"Hey Arthur, why didn't you heal me before? You know when I was practically hanging all over Cayde."

He hummed in response.

"Well mostly because it's not an injury just disuse of muscles so it's better to just use them than to heal them. Also, y'all looked cute."

I glared then nodded.

"Well that makes sense actually. Thanks for speeding up the process. I hope the entertainment was worth it bastard."

When I walked out of the room Cayde was casually leaned up against the wall. Looking like he was showing off to no one. How much does he show off...? When was he not showing off was probably a quicker answer.

"That was fast?"

I nodded.

"Didn't want to keep the vanguard waiting around."

He laughed.

"You do realize I'm never on time."

I shook my head.

"Well it's not my fault if you got roped into doing this job!"

He sighed dramatically.

"Oh woe is the poor vanguard, for the wilds are his home and he's forever doomed to stay amongst the stuffy and boring. Take pity on me!"

I started laughing hysterically. He was so full of it.

"Okay cut the dramatics before we are late. I just want to get this shit done so I can take an extended vacation. Maybe hide in the wilds for a few years. Learn how to be as dramatic as you seem to be."

He glared with no real malice behind his eyes.

"Hey at least I'm not boring!"

I shook my head. And began to walk.

"That you are not!"

The meeting went as well as one could expect. Steal the soul of Crota and open the portal to oryx, get the transmat working and leave. Sounded easy enough again.

"Your plan doesn't leave room for error. What happens when something goes wrong?"

Zavala looked towards me.

"You mean if."

I practically growled my response.

"No, I mean when. You can't always assume that your plans are perfect, and they'll never fail. That's asking for trouble to come your way... You best remember that for next time. Because someone will wind up dead with that train of thought."

I was angry. For no damn reason I was angry. My mood swings were definitely getting worse. Stupid idiotic me for believing in a broken power system.

 _"Trust the system it always works. The chain of command is the best tool you can use to solve a problem."_

 _I growled._

 _"And if it doesn't? Do you just leave airman with no help? No other way to solve something? You think that because you haven't heard of anything happening it won't fail eventually?"_ _  
_  
I shook my head to clear my mind. This was no time to be distracted. I took a deep breath.

"Look, I'm not saying it's not a good plan, but when something goes wrong and I wind up running for my life, don't say I didn't warn you. I'm leaving once I get my shit sorted."

I sauntered out of the room taking a page out of Cayde's dramatic flair book, flourishing my cloak as I left. I walked down the hallway with Arthur at my side.

"I hope he got the message Arthur. I don't want anyone to die because of his arrogance. I'd rather not be in a life or death situation. If it comes down to it, I'd rather it be me than someone important. Also, I ain't following his damn orders and we do this my way."

Arthur seemed to be pondering my words carefully.

"I think he is so used to rules and regulations set for him that he doesn't know how to release his grip of how plans work. I think that's why Cayde and Ikora are with him. They force him to feel freedom to feel like he has no control. Yes though... When shit goes wrong we do this your way."

I tilted my head.

"Huh, never thought of it like that."

I made my way back to the dorm and grabbed my best sniper patience and time and my hand cannon Eyasluna. Next, I grabbed my pulse rifle Hawksaw. All of them were strapped into their holsters that were swung across my back. Well, it was some shit, that's for sure, I must've been a sight.

I then made my way to banshee-44 for an epic shit ton if ammo which Arthur stored for me. My next stop was too my ship, finally. It was midafternoon by the time I boarded and set everything down. I grumbled the whole way I really didn't have this in me, losing my clan was still fresh in my mind. I had to though. I felt it, it was like an unstoppable pull guiding me. I had sworn to protect humanity in both lives. I wasn't a hero though and I really hoped I wasn't regarded as one after this. I didn't need the accolades, I lost my friends and while I was doing this to protect the tower... It was also for a bit of revenge. I wasn't in such a state of mind that I could forgive what had happened, but I was ready to bring justice to those that had wronged my clan. My mind started to run away from me.

 _"The Air Force Cross is awarded to Technical Sergeant Davus for going above and beyond the call of duty to her country. Her sacrifice and dedication, while having a family of her own, is innumerable in measure. On September 31, 2025, thirty-two-year-old Sergeant Davus was deployed to an undisclosed location and in order to save her unit, she was able to kill insurgents in the dead of night before her team were slaughtered in an ambush that she had found plans of that very night. Her unwavering courage and outright bravery were immeasurable. Born on October 12, 1993 she started in a small town of Florida..."_ _  
_  
I shook myself out of the memory, tears coming from my eyes.

"Arthur...you'll need to fly..."

Arthur popped around a corner with a look of concern.

"What's wrong?"

I gave him a sad smile.

"I know when I was born and where..."

If he could drop his jaw I'm sure he would've.

"You remembered?"

I nodded. Holy crap, I'm ancient... Literally.

"October 12... 1993"

He seemed to choke on his response.

"That can't be!"

I nodded again.

"That would mean your nearly 3000 years old!"

I nodded once again my entire body shaking.

"I'm...kinda in shock..."

Arthur settled in front of my face.

"That is absolutely incredible no wonder you couldn't remember anything!"

I agreed. I took a deep breath to clear my thoughts. I had a birthday, I knew when I was from. That was huge... absolutely huge. Also, the perfect distraction before I potentially lost my life to this crazy ass plan.

"Arthur what's todays date?"

He happily replied.

"October 3rd!"

I beamed.

"We should be done with this shit before my birthday! Care to celebrate with me?"

He looked like he was dancing in enjoyment.

"I'll take that as a yes."

For now, I was ready to ignore the horrible problems that I was about to head into. The horrible mess that had happened. I want to enjoy what I was doing. I knew it was time to just get it over with.

The way into Crota's lair was quick going. It seemed like the stealth shield was working, which thank god it did, and I had the opportunity to briefly look around as I made my way down to where a ritual was being held. I practically held my breath as I creeped my way silently, still stealthed to were Crota's soul was. How did I even get wrapped up in this end of the world nonsense? Oh right... My clans' fault...

Of course something would go wrong right as I finished. Having the entire frigen hive conglomeration after me was not what I expected. Nor for coms to go out. I just ran. My mind went blank and I could hear Arthur trying to get anyone on the radio. I just kept running. All of a sudden, I felt myself be teleported out.

"What the fuck!"

Queue me running into a wall...again. I couldn't seem to stop doing that. I'm a damn klutz. I rubbed my head as I looked around wildly.

"We're out. Thanks?"

I heard Eris Morn on the comms. Then there was chatter... A lot of chatter about going and defeating oryx. Talking about going in quickly to get an edge of surprise.

"You want me to what now?"

It was Cayde's voice that responded.

"Go inside, since your ascended and all, whatever the fuck that means, and place a transmat so we can get other guardians to assist you."

He sounded like he was biting his tongue.

"Who's stupid ass idea is this again? How is that even going to work since you can't cross without being ascended? I was the only one going to go already? Isn't that what you thought was going to happen? Didn't we already establish this when I sauntered out of the room? "

Zavala cleared his throat. I slightly heard Cayde cough in the background. While I sighed. Of course, it was his idea. He had no idea what he was doing. I was going to have to do this alone. Kill something that was on the level of the gods. I gave the affirmative that I was on my way back to the dreadnaught and cut com link. I screamed into the sky in frustration.

"Arthur...this is going to go really, really badly. I can just feel it."

He gave me an agreement and I held my breath. I wasn't expecting was to face Oryx alone. Completely and utterly alone. What a battle. I didn't want to do this. I just wanted to be me and explore. A gritted my teeth as we got to the other side. No comms no nothing. No transportation.

"Arthur... This isn't how I want to say good bye. So, let's agree that we get to have my party when we get back. Make it early and celebrate the whole damn week."

Arthur seemed to look down.

"If it does end though, this journey was the best one I have had and I'm glad I could share it with you."

I nodded, no words left and headed to where Oryx awaited. After quickly dispatching his minion I felt the full force of him. I had no light. I had to fight... With no light. Here's the thing I kept my eyes peeled for my taken clan mates but there was nothing there. My mind continued to wander.

 _"Sir, were greatly outnumbered the insurgents are approached from the tops of trees through the forest. We can't see them like this. We need a better way in!"_

 _He snapped at me._

 _"No we keep pushing we are stronger!"_

 _I shook my head and fell to the back. I quickly took inventory of everything I had and made my way around the whole area. It was nightfall by the time I approached the insurgents base. There were very few patrols and I was able to put c4 around the entire facility. As I cleared away I pushed the trigger and watched the camp explode in an eruption. I ran back to my squadron by morning._

 _"No insurgents today eh Davus. We scared them off."_

 _I growled my answer._

 _"No sir, because I planted c4 last night at their base. They are greatly wounded from that and will likely take this time to regroup somewhere else."_

 _His mouth dropped opened._ _  
_  
I shook my head. Getting distracted at this point and time could kill me. I glanced to my right to see Crota's sword. Smiling I grabbed it and went swinging. I kept getting thrown around by hive and taken. I stopped thinking and just kept going at them. Blood had been running down the side of my head for a while and I was becoming dizzy. Arthur was doing his best to heal me out of sight, but he couldn't keep it up while hiding in my helmet. The battle probably lasted only thirty minutes, but it felt like hours had gone by. The final blow was struck, and I sank down in relief. Quickly catching my breath as coms came back on.

"Storm! Guardian"

I gave a quick report.

"Oryx is dead... I'm going to sleep now. Full report tomorrow."

I left the area and went straight to the tower. I was greeted in the hangar by Cayde and Amanda. Thankfully no one else. I felt dead.

"Storm, what the hell, you're a mess."

Arthur popped out and began the slow process of healing me as I sat down on the floor.

"Great deduction Sherlock. You take on a monster that size by yourself and we'll see who gets to laugh then."

I glared at them. Amanda offered me a drink. Smelling of alcohol. I smiled at her.

"Thanks. I appreciate the spice ya added."

She laughed.

"You haven't even tried it yet and you know?"

I nodded and took a long swig.

"So what happened while I was gone. Did Zavala shit himself knowing I was right, and he wasn't?"

Cayde laughed.

"Of course you missed him blowing a fuse trying to figure out how you knew it'd go so badly. Even thought you were in league with him till Ikora shot that one down."

I laughed with him.

"Oh I always assume shit will go wrong. It's better to be safe than sorry."

I was still laughing but it quickly turned into tears. Everything came crashing back down on me. Everyone in my clan, the friends I had made were gone. I had just taken out a monster. Both Amanda and Cayde put a hand on my shoulder. I don't think they were expecting the waterworks, hell I didn't expect them.

"They're gone... I didn't..."

I sat there, a complete mess letting the emotions of the past day catch up to me. The fear, anger, sadness and hopelessness of the battle. My friends that were gone. I felt like I had lost what I had started building. I was such a mess, but I slowly felt myself getting tired as the hysterics calmed down. I still couldn't talk right, I couldn't utter a damn word. I leaned my head down on the nearest thing. Wasn't sure what I was laying on, but it was damn comfortable as I drifted off to sleep.

I sat up screaming. Nightmares plaguing my thoughts. I hyperventilated until Arthur's voice reached me. He spoke calmly saying we were in the tower in my room. I could barely hear him as I peered widely around. The darkened shapes of the room set me on high alert until Arthur turned the lights on. I couldn't calm down. I felt like everything was about to attack me. That I wasn't safe anymore. I grabbed my knife from my armors holster and sat back down. I clutched it like a lifeline.

 _For a long time, I couldn't trust the world. I had seen the ugliness of war at home. I had lost everything to it. All thoughts of peace had been abandoned. My husband, my daughter... gone... Kayden left in the burning wreckage of our once beautiful home. My daughter's body lying still. I didn't want to deal with this life any more. I through myself into battle. Becoming more and more vicious. More and more careless and uncaring. I couldn't trust anyone; my friends became enemies. My allies became people I could use. I had the call sign of maelstrom because of the damage and destruction I left in my wake. But, because of my carelessness. I messed up... I failed a mission. I was blown up by and RPG and knew no more._

I couldn't stop shaking. My past memory of my death quickly mixed into the battle with Oryx. My breath came in short panicked bursts. The room around me closed in on me. The shadows becoming enemies in my eyes. I laid back down to try and sleep, still clutching the knife. Still with the light on.

A month had passed like this. I barely ate drank or slept. I didn't say more than a word in passing. I didn't touch a ship, didn't go near the hangar. I walked as if in a never-ending nightmare. My mind was using everything against me. I jumped at ever sound and every sharp movement. I stopped trusting the people in the tower. I knew they were out to get me, to use me like some toy. My thoughts turned darker and darker as the nightmare became more and more frequent. It was on one of those nights that I finally broke. I was so destroyed, my mind a brand-new battle zone.

I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted this pain to end. I was tired of myself. I couldn't trust anyone. I bid Arthur goodnight knowing what I was planning and hid under the blanket until I was sure he had turned off for the night. It must have been late at night. There didn't seem to be anyone walking around, not sound to be heard, just the quiet stillness of the night. I opened the window peering down into the abyss below. I gave a smile. It was going to be over soon. The dreams, the anxiety, the terror. I let the breeze flow through my shortened hair. Sometime during the past month, I had cut it, trying to change my look. I didn't feel like me, so I figured a new look would help. I wish it had but it wasn't enough. The night time air seemed as if it was holding its breath waiting for an opportunity, to let loose. I looked up into the sky. I wondered if I would really die. I mean my ghost was still there I could never physically hurt Arthur, not after I promised to protect him. At least, I'm sure resurrection only works within immediate use, no time delay allowed. Maybe it wouldn't work by the time the found me. They probably wouldn't be able to find me. Hell, I doubt anyone would even be looking for me. I felt arms grab me and pull me inside.

"What the hell are you doing storm?"

A mechanical voice yelled at me. I looked over my shoulder to see Cayde there and Arthur hovering over his shoulder looking down.

"Ending the pain."

He turned me around to look at him.

"That won't fucking solve shit! All it does is cause more pain around you. People who you never thought cared, are people who actually cared, and you'll know way too late. Yes, problems can get bad, awful, the world can suck and be cruel and unkind. We get an unfair hand of cards and curse what has happened. You make those choices, doing a good deed, but get punished for it and are forced to live with those regrets. I know you have people who were in your life who aren't around anymore, so you need to be around instead. You need to live your life in place of them. It sucks. It's shit. They leave you with all the baggage, all the burdens and bad guys. People can tell you what's best and who you're supposed to be, they'll crush your soul, spirit, mind. Create a fortress for you to break down but you can't let them win by giving up. Don't let those who actually hurt you win this battle because they haven't won the damn war yet. Don't give em the chance to."

Tears rapidly flowed from his ugly and beautiful words. I didn't want to hear them. I tried slamming my hands over my ears.

"No you need to hear this."

He pulled my hands down.

"Life sucks, worlds ending, whatever. If your daughter were here, could you be strong for her? Your husband? Us exos, I'd say were lucky but were not. We were human experiments. Wiped and wiped and used for nefarious purposes. Used to be war machines, shit only use for us was to be killing machines. It sucks being a tool, but I never wanted them to win so my queen and my ace were everything. I still don't know if their real, or I made them up to survive this cruelness. Sometimes not knowing is what keeps me going. You know what happened to your love and child, you must live the life they would want you to and that they never could. If that's not enough. What about yourself. Do you want to be remembered as someone who overcame insurmountable odds? Someone whose life was just beginning? Don't you want to be able to tell people what you've done? Or would you rather they look at you with pity and sympathy? Hell, even if you never accomplished anything big it's worth telling someone about it. Even if it's something small like being able to cook rice! Someone somewhere is going to be proud of you. You don't need to take this path alone! I'm here for you to lean on and not just as the hunter vanguard but as a friend. And if you can't lean on me lean on something. A journal, a show, a different world in your mind, Arthur whatever. Just don't fight this battle alone! Let someone help you. Hell, I'm right here and I refuse to leave until I know you are safe!"

I was in stunned silence. I thought about what he had said. I realized how stupid me jumping would have been. I wouldn't be able to explore any more. I wouldn't be alive. I would have wasted a second chance of life. I had already wasted my first. All these issues, all the pain, could be fought through if I had someone to ground me. I reached out a clung to his cloak.

"The first life... I went crazy...my callsign was maelstrom. After my husband and daughter died...I threw myself into battle. I wound up taking an explosive to the chest because I was careless and died. I went crazy a second time when I found out they had died from the files. The clan found me then. Now I've lost my clan. Rex and I haven't talked I doubt he'd want to, I'm a failure. I couldn't bring anyone home. I could restore our clan, our family..."

My eyes shut tight. Thoughts of self-hatred and failure ran through my mind like a raging beast. Once again, I was shaken out of my thoughts by Cayde shoving me backwards a bit. Still keeping his hands on me Cayde's eyes were a fierce blue. Piercing, and coming from a place of understanding, soft, shocking me from tears.

"Never say that."

It was a cold growled out sound but filled with warmth and concern.

"You are not a failure. It's enough. You are enough. Just being there. Just showing up. Just waking up. It's enough."

His voice was soft. I looked up and nodded. I was still wound up and frightened. Still thinking that it might just be better to end it. He sighed and pulled up a chair.

"Bed now."

I nodded quietly picking up my knife and keeping it in my hand as I laid down. He reached for it. I tight end my grip in fear.

"I'll be here all night. Just sleep."

I released my grip and let him take it. I knew he'd keep his word, I knew I was safe if he was around. Logic won that battle. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

* * *

That was the lowest point I had ever sunken too. His words are what I needed to hear though. It saved me that night and countless nights since then. His never-ending concern help get me through the worst of my trauma. I don't know what would've happened if Arthur hadn't called him. I was glad he was my friend, a real friend that stopped my idiocy. Unfortunately, more bad news was headed my way... I didn't find out till a couple of days later that Rex had been successful in his own attempt. I felt guilty for a while that someone had saved me and not him. That I was the survivor of the horrendous mess that Oryx had created. That story is a story for later though. The next part of this chapter begins the next morning...


	6. Chapter 6

Note from Author: Thank you all so much for reading! I did this chapter as quickly as I could, I wanted to get this out before the weekend. So without further ado, ENJOY! Feel free to review!

* * *

The next morning when I had woken up Cayde was still there. I was pretty much on bed rest at that point. I really wasn't allowed to be unsupervised but, Arthur always kept an eye on me. Arthur would watch me when he went to get food. I seemed to be on a twenty-four-hour watch for a while, but It wasn't until the next day after my suicide attempt that Cayde had set up a video for me to watch. I hadn't been expecting this amount of... I don't know...attention from him at this point. I didn't know he cared that much.

* * *

I was weak. I had no strength left to stand. Arthur was in the room with me talking nonchalantly about some lore about some iron lords during the battle of twilight gap. And something called Fellwinter peak? I didn't have a clue.

"Arthur...thank you."

I had cut him off. He almost looked surprise that I spoke.

"I'm your ghost. I'm here to protect you, just like you've protected me."

I gave a small smile. I didn't feel like myself at all, I felt numb. Arthur continued his rant while I listened with half an ear. I couldn't seem to get myself to do anything. I had no motivation, no drive. Just pain and sadness plaguing my mind.

" _Davus… What is wrong with you?"_

 _My child was gone, I was with a new unit, with my new supervisor. He really was reaming me out for nothing but a bad attitude. I really didn't need to deal with this person._

" _None of your concern sir."_

 _I had enough of his patronization. I started to walk away, ignoring him._

" _Davus, you will be written up if you don't tell me what's with this shit attitude of yours."_

 _He had grabbed my wrist. I glared at him with hatred._

" _Sir. If you are so desperate to know, why I am like this? Why don't you ask the commander? No, that's not good enough is it? How about this. What would you do if you lost your wife and child? No, you wouldn't know that. You don't have them. Well, I did, and I lost them during the collapse."_

I shook my head to clear the memory. Cayde had come in as the sun pierced the mid-day sky. I truthfully wasn't expecting him to come back. I was a mess, no one should have to deal with me. I went from angry, to sad, back to numb. I looked at him as he approached my bed. He had a tablet in his hand and a bowl of soup in the other. I titled my head to the side in confusion. What the hell was he up to? He said nothing as he placed it and soup in front of me. I slowly sipped on the soup as he hit the play button on the video. It first showed Ikora.

"Cayde what are you doing here so early?"

I heard Cayde laugh.

"I can sometimes do my job. Actually, I've come with a question. It's a bit odd really but just a random thought. What would've happened if we lost Storm?"

I blinked in surprised at the video. What was this? Cayde motioned for me to keep watching. Ikora had an anguished face on.

"It would have been too soon... I have barely gotten to known her, but she is brave and courageous. She took a job that should've meant death with everything that went wrong. Even with news if losing her clan. I don't think I could've faced anything if I lost my team. She's an inspiration. Someone to be admired. Why?"

"No reason, just curious to your thoughts. We could've lost her. Didn't know how anyone would feel."

My mouth dropped open in shock the next person in the video was Zavala. Cayde asked him the same question.

"It would be my fault for sending her on such a reckless mission. We would have lost one of the best guardians this city had known. Yes, she avoided most of the main missions in the beginning she has become an undeniable asset. Though I have barely spoken a word to her, I can see how she inspires other just by talking to them. She gives the newbies pointer, hints whenever the come up to her. She seems to be in the hangar helping there constantly. Even the speaker has acknowledged she makes people smile. The tower would be darker without her light shining."

The video cut next to Amanda and again the same question was asked.

"Cayde you better not be hiding something!"

I heard a nervous laughter.

"Now why would you think that? I'm just curious! She seems like she's done a lot of work around here!"

Amanda laughed.

"She's one of the best workers we have, I'd be damned if I lose her! You better not scare me into thinking she's taking another dangerous mission. Haven't seen her in a while! Been thinking she's recovering so that's what she better be doing. I need her here to keep me sane with this shit."

The video then cut to the tech that had left me my first day in the hangar.

"I wouldn't be as in love with this job as I am now. She showed me to never give up even when it looks hopeless because it can be a simple fix if looked at from a different angle. She completely told me off the next time she saw me. I felt like a kid getting scolded. I'm glad she did so though."

The next images were of other guardians around the tower. Even banshee 44 was in the video. Tears sprung to my eyes. He went so out of his way just to get me my answer.

"Now you know how many people's lives you've touched. More than most people ever get the chance to see."

I looked at Cayde.

"Why?"

He tilted his head.

"Why what?"

I looked down.

"Why do so much for someone, you barely know."

He beamed.

"I hope to be a good man...exo... Whatever, you get my point. Also, you're my hunter. I care for all my hunters. Especially when I ghosts contacts me through an emergency channel."

I nodded. Wiping my tears from my face and standing on shaky legs. I needed to get out. I couldn't be in this place filled with so much love to a person they barely knew.

"I'm going to the wilds. I need to escape from here for a bit. I think... Fresh air will do me some good."

He nodded.

"Just...send a message ever few hours."

I nodded. Arthur and I raced, when I say raced I mean I was staggering, to the hangar and jumped into the ship. He quickly piloted me out to our hide out. I needed to run, to jump, to dance. I screamed, I cried. I felt all the numbness sink away. I had become a pot of water boiling over with unbridled emotion. I wanted to be me again. I wanted normalcy. I knew it wouldn't happen overnight. It may take years, but I needed to take a step in that direction. I needed to learn how to walk again. I didn't want to feel numb again, I never wanted to feel that again. I felt the light build from inside me and shot the trees dead center as I ran by them. Three shots. I stopped. Maybe...maybe I could do that with my knife. I waited until my light built again and tried. Nothing... Nothing happened.

"Damn..."

Arthur popped behind me.

"What are you trying to do?"

I smiled a real smile the first time in weeks.

"Have a golden knife."

Arthur started cackling.

"I think a bit more research into light is needed before we even try and figure that one out."

I laughed.

"Then I guess we know exactly what we're going on the hunt for..."

He titled his body.

"What?"

I grinned like a Cheshire cat.

"A lead!"

I took off like a bat out of hell. I was free, freer than I had felt just that morning. For the first time in weeks... I was happy.

* * *

It wasn't until later that my happiness would be shattered into a million pieces. I didn't find out that rex had died till later. Apparently, the ghosts all knew and rushed to the scene with their guardians, but it was too late to do anything. I wasn't as numb as I thought I would be, just distraught. I truly was the last of my clan. The letter he left was enough to send my mind reeling but, I recovered quickly, living on in all their names. I was no longer going to let their deaths be in vain. Cayde's words had struck a chord and the messages that everyone had said gave me the will to live. I used that to drive me forward. A couple of months had passed from that night and I was finally back to a state of semi normalcy. I eventually did get the clan back up and running but, that's not a story for today.

* * *

It was my first time back in the hangar in months and Amanda looked swamped. Completely and utterly frazzled. She was running back and forth trying to get most of the techs to work. It didn't seem like they were listening to her. She was pretty much screaming at them, but no one was listening the sounds of the conversation sounding completely over what she was saying. I was scared, it had been so long since I had been around to help.

" _Look, there is a disconnect between or reservists and active duty no matter how much you want to say there isn't, stop trying to pretend there isn't. There isn't a damn thing we can do about it because of how those reservists work, it's once a month and most of the time they are gone on appointments so yes, its going to be hard to get cohesion."_

I sighed shaking my head and walked over to the center of the hangar and let off my golden gun. The three shots made the silence that echoed after almost defining.

"Now that it's quiet, you should probably listen to Holliday if you don't want to wind up at the other end of this gun."

Amanda looked at me with relief. She gave the techs their assignments and came straight over to me.

"Thank you. I got a huge job to do and too many new techs with barely any training to get it done. Think you can help me out?"

I smiled.

"Of course! What can I help you with?"

She gave me the full list of tasks to complete and I went by to all fifteen ships to help where I was needed. There wasn't just one group that needed help, it was all of them. The list of maintenance was insane. There were engine rebuilds, entire system repairs and servicing to boot. By the time night fell only three ships couldn't get fixed. Those were the ones that were waiting on parts. They didn't come in, in time. Everyone sat on the floor exhausted as the new shift came in. Amanda stood in front of us.

"Thank you all for your hard work today..."

She slid a cooler in front of us.

"Drinks on me."

We all sat down and began talking and drinking. I felt normal again. Like I could begin to trust again and that this was a place I needed to be to help. It was such a relief after months of feeling like another person.

"Holliday! You didn't invite me!"

A mechanical voice called.

"That's because of who you are."

A woman called. Ikora, Zavala and Cayde had walked into the hangar.

"Sorry to disturb miss Holliday, need my ship fixed. Fuel distributers broke again."

She nodded.

"Hand it over to Marc, he's taking over night shift now."

Zavala nodded and walked off to whom I assume was Marc. I smiled at the duo sitting down and grabbing a beer.

"Long day?"

I questioned.

"Too long... Siva is back."

I tilted my head. Siva? I think Arthur mentioned it to me at one point.

"What's that?"

I questioned Ikora.

"Think of it like a virus."

I nodded.

"So super bad crap."

She laughed.

"You could say that."

Cayde decided to join in.

"It's like bad on top of bad which will wipe out life and add some more bad too it."

I grimaced.

"That's awful. I hope it goes well. Well, as well as it can go."

Ikora nodded.

"Enough about doom and gloom though, there been enough of that recently. How about a game?"

Cayde pulled out a deck of cards as he finished his question.

"Anyone for poker?"

I grinned evilly! This was the one game I had down pat, one game I truly remembered.

"You're going down!"

A few other joined in and Ikora sat too watch. The night continued as we played game, after game, after game. Cayde and I wound up being the last people left in the hangar besides the night shift crew. We were deep into the matches. He dealt the final hand that we had to break our tie and looked towards me with concern.

"How have you been holding up since..."

I smiled. I did forget to send him messages. Oops...

"Better, I still have bad moments and days but, it's getting better and less frequent. Not as many night mares either."

He nodded as he switched his card out. This was one of those poker games that required switching to get what you needed. It was pretty fun. I don't remember if those were the original rules of the game, probably not but this is how we played now.

"What have you been so avidly researching? Trying to find your past again?"

Arthur told him we were doing research again I guess. Oh boy, he would love this. I shook my head and grinned.

"Think golden gun but with knifes."

His eyes seemed to brighten.

"Now wouldn't that be something! You'll have to teach me if you learn it first or vice a versa with me. Now I'm just curious to find out."

I played my royal flush and saw his jaw drop.

"And that's 5 for me and 4 for you!"

I did a little happy dance sitting down. Yes, I beat the card master at his own game. Brilliant ok me.

"I lost? How could I have lost! How'd you do that?"

I laughed.

"It's a secret!"

He shook his head and picked up the cards.

"Well, color me impressed!"

We walked out of the hangar talking about everything, anything. I enjoyed his company, I never wanted it to end.

"You'll need to bring me back some stories next time you go out, with this Siva stuff around, I'm kind of a liability."

I nodded giving a grimace, it wasn't just him who was a liability.

"I think it makes us all a liability not just you. If that shit gets here well have guardian again guardian and not just in some crucible match."

He glanced my way.

"You really think that?"

I once again agreed. Damn this shit could get ugly real fast. I really didn't want to think about this path again. Maybe change topic? Yeah that sounds like a better idea than to try and wrap my head around another world ending thing.

"So... You know that you've never really told me about your memories? Or hell, even how the hell that works? I mean I've heard of DER and wiping but, I don't quiet understand how you couldn't keep your original memories?"

He gave a sad smile but anger flashed through his eyes. The anger confused me.

"See, it's because I was in over my head in debt I became an exo. Which mind you I'm looking great for my age and it was way before I became a guardian. I wanted to protect my family. I think… I may have made them up. I only know about my queen and my ace because of my journal. It's weird really. I can't remember their faces. I can't remember anything. It's mostly because of Clovis Bray and what the people in that place did. I can't tell if maybe I made them up to be a better person or if they actually existed and I just attached a persona to them or if I really had that family. Hell, it could be a mixture of all of that."

We had stopped walking in the courtyard. I guided him over to the stares where we sat in the traveler's light.

"I'm sorry, I wouldn't have asked if I knew this was going to be so painful for you to remember."

He shook his head. I'm an idiot. Of course, he's had it rough.

"Its fine, I think I needed to tell someone about the doubts and confusion I feel. It's weird though, can't talk to my fireteam and I can't talk to other guardians who just want to get missions done and leave. It's hard being old sometimes. I try to have some sort of relationship with them but most of them just get their missions and leave. Sometimes I go all day without talking about something other than work. Though, it's not really painful, just… different."

I placed my hand on his shoulder. I guess he felt alone. I didn't blame him. He can't run through the wilds anymore with being the vanguard and all, even if he did escape sometimes. He had to go through life the slow route, no one to really rely on. He must be so damn lonely. I clenched my teeth than tilted my head raising my eyebrow in confusion.

"Wait...turned into an exo? You were human?"

He smiled.

"A long time ago, before the golden age..."

I nodded, what could I say to that, that is an impressive feet. I all the sudden remembered I didn't celebrate my birthday. Shit, it had come and gone with all if the drama. This would be great way to get him out of this place and give me a chance to celebrate quietly.

"Well, maybe tomorrow night we can sneak out and do something fun."

I said more to myself than to anyone else.

"You're going to break me out of here? For what reason? Some crazy mission?"

I laughed.

"No! My birthday passed a while ago and with all the drama I forgot, and I figured it's a good excuse to do something!"

Why was I nervous? Don't be nervous? Your being stupid. How is this my brain? Stupid self. Arthur must be getting to me or something. Stupid ghost ideas and all.

"Birthday? The day you woke as a guardian?"

He was trying wrack his brain looking for the date. It showed on his face. I laughed at the look of concentration.

"Nope. My real birthday, the day I was first born into this crazy, fucked up world."

He shook his head. Again. What. The. Hell. Is. Wrong. With. Me. I feel like an idiot.

"You're mouthy. So, when was it since you missed it?"

I smiled. I wasn't going to say the year. No, this would be my chance to get him to lose against me again.

"October 12!"

He mock growled.

"You going to leave me hanging without the year? Or do you not know that?"

I laughed.

"Oh I do, but since you like games so much, figured we could play one with that. Guess the year correctly within 2 months, and I'll sneak you out whenever, as long as there's no pressing concerns to deal with and buy you spicy ramen for a month."

He looked to be seriously considering it. He couldn't deny that ramen. Too bad he was going to lose.

"How many guesses per day?"

I smiled.

"Three."

He seemed to almost growl his response.

"Deal, and my first guess for today since its well past midnight is 4200?"

I laughed.

"Nope!"

He swore under his breath.

"Am I close?"

Oh man he had no idea. So far off...so very, very far off.

"Not even. If you get within 10 years, I'll call it good."

He looked to be pondering.

"So what do you get if you win?"

I laughed and stood up.

"A favor. Cause those could be important."

He nodded.

"Fair trade, now what happens if I guess the exact number.?"

I thought about for a moment.

"Guess the exact moment and I'll split the vanguard duties with you."

Once again his jaw dropped. I knew he would never be able to guess; there was no way in hell he could. Most guardians didn't live through or remember dying during the collapse.

"That's one hellova gamble then!"

I nodded. Damn he was going to be persistent to guess the exact date now. This was an interesting little game I concocted. We made our way to the elevator and got in chatting the whole time. He was attempting to get me to reveal something. Tough luck. We parted ways as we reached his floor. I gave a little wave towards him. When the doors shut Arthur popped out.

"Well this should be an interesting game no matter how it turns out."

I laughed.

"Should be fun once we sneak out tomorrow too."

Arthur seemed to manically gleam at me.

"What...are you staring at?"

He seemed to open his eye super wide.

"You like him."

I cocked my eyebrow. The fuck was he going on about?

"Huh?"

I deadpanned.

"You completely like Cayde!"

This ghost must have been exposed to too much light. This wasn't the first time he brought it up. I mean yes, I was nervous around him, he still was my mentor but like him?

"The fuck you on about dude?"

He flitted around me as I unlocked the door. This ghost was trying to make something out of nothing apparently.

"Let me repeat it slowly. You...have... a... crush... on... Cayde."

This ghost lost his mind.

"Care to explain that conclusion?"

I quickly took off my armor and was left in civilian clothes.

"You're nervous around him."

I raised my eyebrow again. That's what he was basing this on? My nervousness?

"That's your justification? Of course, I'm nervous he's a mentor to me! Hell he is the last friend I have now!"

I shook my head and laid down.

"Go to sleep Arthur, leave the crazy to the dreams."

The ghost was seriously on something. I closed my eyes and drifted into a deep sleep.

The next morning greeted me. I quickly got dressed and starts forming a plan to get Cayde out of the tower. Arthur was still blearily following me. He was not a morning ghost at all. I started my search down at the gun range, where I noticed a door. A locked door. Almost out of sight and hidden. Oh, this should be fun. I pried the lock off to discover a passage way. Yay dark creepy tunnel. Queue ominous music. I made my way down to the end to be greeted by bright sunshine. Good a silent way out. One with a damn perfect excuse. I ran back through the tunnel placing the lock in such a way that it looked closed and locked. Next would be to get Cayde away from the vanguard. I strolled up through the tower taking the stairs this time putting on a front of mock depression and a pout to sell it. I walked with my head hung low into the briefing room where Ikora, Cayde and Zavala stood arguing.

"Um...excuse me..."

I made my voice sound shy and nervous.

All three of them looked toward me.

"Yes guardian?"

Zavalla acknowledged me. Oh, this was perfect.

"Sir, I'm having trouble with my golden guns aim. Is it possible to borrow Cayde for some training?"

Cayde sighed.

"Were a bit busy storm, maybe later?"

I sadly nodded and started to turn away.

"Let Cayde help her, he can't do much with Siva, Saladin oversees this anyway. It's our duty as the vanguard to help train and prepare our guardians for the battlefield. If her aim is so off she had to come ask for help, its best we let him help her so she can be useful for important missions."

Ikora butted in.

"But Siva is so interesting!"

Zavalla looked thoughtful.

"Go Cayde, it'll get you out of my hair for a while."

Cayde smirked.

"You don't have hair for me to get into in the first place."

He huffed and walked past me. I almost couldn't contain the giggles.

"Thank you sir, ma'am"

Ikora gave a soft smile.

"Think nothing of it. He has been driving us crazy. Endless questionnaire and please call me Ikora, ma'am makes me sound ancient."

Zavala nodded as I strode off after Cayde though, once we got down to the range the front was off.

"That was magnificently brilliant! Now how about we get out of here!"

I started laughing.

"But... How do we get out without being noticed?"

I laughed harder before being able to speak again.

"Follow me."

I opened the door as we walked through.

"I never noticed this here before. Damn you have some skills there."

Once again I laughed. Dang, for someone who notices everything he sure was oblivious to hide holes in the tower.

"I was looking for a good excuse and finding this was pretty much the best excuse I could hope for. Especially if I said a normal gun I could've gotten anyone here to help."

He smiled. Well what looked like smiling.

"Smart."

We walked through to the other side of the wall and hoped into my ship and took off to the other side of the Cosmodrone. My hide away had a lot of areas I hadn't explored yet.

"When's the last time you just came out here to explore?"

He shook his head.

"Probably the time you stumbled into my hide out."

I laughed.

"God I was so nervous than. Jumpy all over the place. Didn't want you to know that I had just found files on myself."

He laughed.

"Well that is a thing. That creature... I've seen before just, can't remember where."

I shook my head.

"That shit scared the crap outta me. Wasn't expecting that."

I smiled at him. What a day already and it had only just begun. We landed and began to search into the forest nearby finding a cave. Pretty hidden in the rocks of the hill. We smile and went in. I quickly loaded my gun and made sure I had everything in place.

"3986."

Cayde said. I laughed again. I was full of laughter these past couple of days. I was moving on. I was starting to live my life again.

"Nope!"

Cayde cussed in response. He was adamant in trying to get the age thing. He was never going to get it. We rushed through the alcove which lead into an opening with glowing flora around. It was breath taking. A little pool of water sat at our feet and seemed to go on for a long while. I gently waded into the water to find that it kept getting deeper up over my head. I went back always so I could stand. Cayde had followed closely behind.

"I don't think we're going to be able to go this way."

He agreed.

"You just might be right about that. Don't know how long I can swim for but your flesh and get tired easily."

I stuck my tongue out.

"At least I can't rust!"

Most of the day was spent like that. Just joking around and talking about everything and nothing. As the sun set we rushed back to the gun range and actually got some practice in.

"Did you find anything on golden knifes?"

I asked. He grinned.

"Stand back unless you would like to be butchered."

I watched as he jumped, spun around and chucked golden knifes into the target. My jaw dropped.

"No fucking way! You've had one fucking night!"

He grinned.

"I may have found things in the warlock library."

He really did it. Besides the fact that my search had turned nothing in months and he had one night and figured out how to do it. His aim was way over the place though.

"It needs work, but it wasn't hard. I have been a guardian for a while."

I couldn't believe it. Needless to say, I was impressed and speechless. Also annoyed… No fair…

"Not fair… Months… Months I've looked! You need to teach me sometime!"

Ikora and Zavala had come looking for us and barged right through the door.

"Cayde you've been down here for hours!"

He blinked at them, looked away in a daze and then looked like he focused back. Must have checked an internal clock? I had no idea, I would have to ask him later.

"Shit...it's really late! I didn't realize!"

I tilted my head.

"Wait what time is it?"

Zavala shook his head.

"Nearly 1900."

I let my jaw drop in mock surprise. Damn we were playing this off good.

"Oh fuck! I was supposed to meet with someone at 1700!"

I exclaimed, laying it on thick. Zavala looked at me.

"And you were supposed to meet who?"

I sighed. I put my best acting in the forefront of my mind.

"The tech that on my first day in the hangar abandoned me. He's been learning from me now and I said I'd show him how to do the fire loop wiring on the engine."

How I pull this shit out of my ass, I'll never know. Cayde looked like he was holding in giggles but played it off as a cough. Zavala shook his head.

"Did you get your aim right now?"

I nodded.

"Would you like to see?"

Ikora nodded.

"Yes, proof is a valuable thing."

I smiled, they knew we left. Or maybe they didn't but had a suspicion. It is Cayde after all. So, in order to surprise them and make him look good, I blind folded myself and took a breath lining myself up with the target. I've done practice like this before. Thousands of times before, boredom is a beautiful thing.

 _ **"If you want to get better with feeling where your target is, take away your eyesight. Losing one sense makes the others stronger. Put ear defenders on to get rid of a second sense."**_

Arthur exclaimed. I was at the range practicing my golden gun for the first time.

I let lose three quick bursts dead center into the target's bullseye. All three looked shocked. Even Cayde, which he quickly hid with a smug smirk.

"Well, that's some proof. Now if you excuse us."

I smirked and waved.

"Thanks for teaching me Cayde!"

He gave a soft smile and walked with them. I quickly gathered my things and headed back to my room.

* * *

Those were some interesting days. That was the very first time we snuck out together. Coordinating our stories and weaving a tale of two hunters. Mentor and student. We used this excuse a few times. There was once for golden gun, once for blade dancer and another for night stalker. I still had my golden gun preference and it was what I was the best at. I didn't know it at that point, but Arthur may have been correct in assuming I had a crush. Plausible deniability though and me being dense didn't help. On top of that, losing my clan was still fresh in my mind as well as oryx. Soon enough though that two-month period of guessing had ended. That final day was something I don't think I could ever forget.


	7. Chapter 7

If you told me then that I would have experienced something that would be the beginning of the end, I wouldn't believe you. I couldn't believe that this was my life now. Those damn people think they can control everything like that. It's disgusting. I know, this doesn't make much sense as of right now but, it will later. It started off like a normal day but ended in a damn roller coaster ride. Sometimes life throws you extremely unexpected curve balls. Insanely unexpected curve balls... 

* * *

Today was the last damn day Cayde had to guess. It was about time too, not that I was bored with the game, just didn't know what else to do with my time. I dressed in my typical cargo pants and tank top to wander the tower. Leaving my room was a battle within my mind. Did I really want this game to end? I was used to Cayde's company almost all the time. Walking through the courtyard I ran into Cayde like every morning since our game started.

"2860!"

I laughed.

"Nope! Two last guesses and you're late!"

He sighed and sulked off to what I guess were his vanguard duties. He seemed to be always running late. I doubt he would get the year he was still over 1,000 years off. Poor guy. I laughed. This was stupid entertaining. Cayde just couldn't win at this...nor at poker. So far, I have won 8 out of 10 games we have played. I saunter off to our dining facility and got some breakfast. Arthur popped out and plopped on the table.

"How do you wake this early?"

He seemed to mumble.

"How for a machine are you this tired?"

He gave a little shrug. I laughed and shoved some eggs into my mouth... I spaced out. When I looked across the table from me, there was a person sitting there. Okay. When did someone start sitting with me? I apparently am an oblivious idiot.

"Hi! Are you storm?"

I nodded and tilted my head.

"You are?"

The female awoken smiled at me. Her bright purple hair and golden eyes slightly unnerved me, but she seemed friendly enough.

"I'm Raven! Cayde told me to come find you if I wanted to get tips on golden gun. He said you were his best student."

Face meet palm. Damn I knew he was going to get me back for this gamble. My eyebrow twitched.

"I guess technically I am. What can I help you with?"

She beamed at me grabbing my hand with vigor shaking it up and down.

"I can't seem to aim worth a damn, thank you so much it is so amazing to meet you. Did you really shoot the golden gun blindfolded? Is it true you defeated oryx? I mean how'd you do that alone? Did you really lose your whole clan?"

I smiled. That was one string of sentences there.

"Let me finish breakfast and we'll go down to the range. I'll try to answer your questions then."

I ate quietly while she babbled on about everything. My goodness this girl never stopped talking. Arthur seemed to get moodier as she went on and I nodded to him to disappear for a while. We got down to the gun range and she quickly ran over to a lane, grabbed a hand cannon and started shooting. I blinked. How the hell did she even hit anything in the field firing like that? I barely had time to register what had happened. She was all over the place. Her hyper disposition showed in her shooting. Completely a newbie. I put my hand on my head, shaking it, sighing and walked towards her.

"Well your super trigger happy first off. Second your rushing the shot, third your anticipating the recoil."

I deadpanned. She looked almost shocked and wound up running away with her gob. I couldn't catch what she had said. I shook my head and walked over to her correcting her stance.

"First of all even out your breathing, your jerking your arms around when your breath so rapidly. Second don't just hit the trigger, you want to squeeze until you find that sweet spot, the point just before you shoot and third don't imagine the recoil. You can practice that by not shooting a loaded gun. These same principles apply to the golden gun as well."

I quickly emptied her gun of bullets and handed back to her. She finally quieted down a bit to pay attention which I was grateful for. By the time I had got her comfortable with shooting and not jerking the gun around it was lunch time.

"Thank you! I've learned so so much!"

I shook my head.

"I didn't have any plans today, so it was no problem."

She waved and was off. I sighed

"Dear god she never shut up!"

Arthur popped out.

"You be nice. She was talkative is all."

He bristled. He clearly was annoyed. He was used to someone with a quieter disposition, so it made sense.

"That wasn't just talkative."

I shook my head and headed to the spicy ramen shop for lunch. Cayde and I always seemed to meet here for lunch and for his second guess of the day. I sat down next to him and ordered a bowl of shio ramen. Somehow, we always managed to time it pretty well with no communication whatsoever.

"Your late and 2436!"

I laughed.

"I'm late because of a little birdie who was sent to me for training and still wrong."

He slammed his fists into the table. The ramen bounced in its bowls as I raised my brows at him.

"How am I still wrong after all this time!"

I laughed even harder at his dramatics.

"Because your bad at guessing?"

He gave a slight growl glaring in my direction.

"Your just bad at aging!"

I started snorting.

"That's not a bad think you nit wit."

He seemed to sit straighter and puff his chest out almost like he was showing off… wait scratch that, he was always showing off.

"By the travelers crack, how the fuck old are you!"

I smirked at his disbelief.

"You'll find out tonight, patience is a virtue. And you're going to be late again."

He shook his head and walked away. He looked back one time and waved so I waved back. Like an idiot really. Ikora then spoke from behind me. Talk about silent. I almost jumped out of my skin. Guess that was who he was waving at.

"He still hasn't guessed correctly?"

I laughed again and turned to face her.

"Nope, not even close after two months of guessing."

She smiled.

"I'm glad this distraction is keeping him happy... He's usually not this... excitable and doesn't keep interest very well...especially on days like today..."

I blinked. The hell was she on about? Wasn't she just here to get him to whatever the vanguard do?

"Huh?"

She looked towards the main courtyard sadly.

"This is the day he has written down that his wife and kid died."

I looked at her with wide eyes.

"How do you know something like that? "

She looked away sadly.

"I found them, his journals, on a mission one night... He had gone off with Zavala, I stayed behind to set up the comms. I looked over to where he had been sitting a moment ago and saw them. Curiosity took ahold of me and I read through one of them. Today's date is mentioned as the date he lost everything. Keep an eye out for him, he'll need a friend, no just someone he's required to work with. I know you two meet three times a day for your bet."

I nodded in agreement. Where the hell was this going? Ikora wasn't herself, no wait, yes she was just a different type of run around. Damn her for being so cryptic.

"I'll keep an eye out...but why me? You've been around him for a while. Why not you?"

She gave a small sad smile.

"He seems less lonely around you. He's been more hopeful as of late."

I raised an eyebrow in confusion. Cayde was lonely? How's that possible? She continued.

"Cayde's very old. He's never given us an exact number just... He was around for the collapse. He was around for the darkness and the hellish days after."

I smiled sadly. He had suffered during that time as well but, didn't take his own life on purpose. I can't tell if that was really a good idea to live through that, but I wouldn't know. My face was set in a grimace.

 _"Kayden!"_

 _I ran down the burning wreckage of my street. The tv from a shop glaring the date from behind me._

 _"Aselynn!"_

 _I shouted over the gunfire and roars of the collapse going on around me. My phone in my hand as I ran. I had tried calling them. No answer._

I shook my head tears threatening to fall. Well, that date was today, no escaping that fact.

"It wasn't peaceful or even a livable era..."

I nodded at her comment. I knew that, I had known it. I looked into her eyes. Somehow, she knew, or at least had a guess to how old I might have been. I forced a smile through my teeth.

"I'm sure, but yes, I'll keep an eye out. He happens to be one of my closet friends."

She gave a gentle smile and walked off. Cayde was around back then too, through all of that insanity? My god how did he keep sane? Had I ever met him? Did we ever know each other? Maybe… Questions bombarded my mind as I finished my ramen. I shook my head and walked over to where the net in the hangar was. Don't know if it was a safety thing or not but I sat watching the ships come in and out of the hanger. Something I did to just keep my head on straight. I shook my head to clear said questions. If he wanted me know he would've told me. Well… if he could remember that is. I smiled thinking back to the lunch I just had. I did get another piece of information from the memory. Even if it was a bad one. My daughter's name. Aselynn. What a pretty name. Kayden, Aselynn and Adrine. Almost seemed like an acronym.

I wandered around the tower for a long time, trying to find more hidden areas, potentially anything that would help Cayde leave if he ever needed to get away. I seem to be good at that. Not only that, but I needed to come to the terms that this was the same day, that same day I had seen in the tapes. It was like a far-off pain, and odd feeling. I must have circled the tower once or twice, I didn't really keep track of where I was going. I had made my way back into the hangar when Cayde finally found me. The hangar was empty, there were very few people wandering around. Just the normal nightshift crew. It seemed eerily quiet. It must have been very late. I sighed, I had completely lost track of time. Cayde approached quietly, which was unusual.

"You're late."

He didn't smile didn't say anything just sat down quietly. I quickly sat down next to him. He had to have been thinking back on that day or at least trying to. When he did speak it was just a number.

"2200..."

I gave him a soft smile.

"Still wrong but it was the closet guess. You're unusually quiet?"

Hinting at what I had learned this afternoon. I wondered if he would open up to me. Stop this game of distrust.

"Yeah... long day."

I put my hand on his shoulder. He was being obtuse… he really wasn't one to put his pain or worries onto others. Stubborn…

"I'm here to talk if you need to. You don't have to face whatever it is alone. Not everyone can be strong all of the time."

He shook his head. I sighed. He really thought he was alone in his pain, I was almost angry at that thought. I grinded my teeth, almost in annoyance. I hope my answer to my birth year would show him that he was being silly and dumb, that he had a friend here.

"Cayde... I was born in 1993... I know what today's date signifies."

His eyes widened. I quickly rambled on.

"There is not one person who didn't loose something during the collapse. Most lost their lives, some their minds, others their souls. I lost my family, my daughter, my husband…"

His head tilted down.

"I don't remember what I lost, who I lost, when I lost."

I shook my head quietly and listened. I kept my hand there as an anchor for him. He was way too quiet... Too serious... He was not the Cayde I had come to know it, it was a different side of him I had never seen. I don't think he let many people see this side if any at all.

"I've been thinking, that my son, my queen, they aren't real. Just super imposed to prevent me from being a bad man. Maybe I'm just in love with the ideas the memories bring, or maybe I'm in love with the idea of having someone else there for me... Someone who knows what it was like. I can see dark images, horrible really..."

I put my forehead to his. He sounded lost, alone, maybe even scared. This was him exposing his most innermost thoughts. His memory loss was curse, I could hear that in his voice. This… is what was hidden underneath all of that bravado, hyperness, and silliness. Just raw exposed emotion like a nerve.

"Cayde, the memories don't truly go away, the images and faces never fade. Even if you can't remember now. You potentially could remember tomorrow. Even if it takes another thousand years, whether there real or not shouldn't matter. They are inscribed in your heart now, you feel for their memories, whether they be real or fake. Thats enough. You were the one to show me that. "

He was silent for a while.

"You know, I use playing cards to help trigger memories, I have crap scattered everywhere."

He tried to force a smile. I shook my head.

"You don't need to pretend around me, I'm not bothered by this, you don't need to act happy if that's not what your feeling. That war was a one-sided losing battle that I eventually lost my first life too. I can't imagine living through the entire thing. You do not have to face this alone. Even of you can't speak of it, I'm still here to lean on. Its time I return the favor. You have been an amazing friend to me, done more than I could ever hope to repay... I don't want you to be strong if your forcing yourself to be. It still doesn't change what I think of you and it never will, even if you wind up being a murder bot, I don't care, you're still my best friend."

He laid his head into my shoulder and his shoulders shook in silent tears. This exo, this man had been strong for far too long alone. He didn't have people to trust. The past had long since broken him of that. He must have dealt with horrible people if he had never opened to anyone other than a journal. I wanted to be there for every moment. I wanted to keep him safe just like he had for me. Be his shield and sword for when he needed me. We must have sat there for hours but I couldn't find myself caring. I held onto him letting him know it was okay, I would protect him, yet I knew I didn't need to convey those feelings into words. I quietly kept him company as the sun rose on the horizon. I made a quiet bet to myself. I wouldn't let him face this alone. Everyone deserves a person they can lean on without fearing judgement. I heard a soft snore from below me. At some point he fell asleep. I smiled looking at him. He looked tired, worn, almost like the metal was showing his age. I shifted him on to my lap as softly as I could, I didn't want to wake him. Who knows when the last time he got a decent rest in. From what I knew of exos they still needed to sleep or shut down to recharge but just not as often as humans or awoken. What he must have been through was... A fucking shit storm. He really was one of the most guarded people I met. I thought long and hard seeing if he ever revealed more than just the two people in his life I knew about. He hadn't, nothing personal, no small detail. His guard never slipped. I gave a soft sad smile. The sun rose into the sky much faster than I believed possible. I sighed as the tower was beginning to waken. Doubt that he would want people thinking he was sleeping on the job as well as running from it.

"Cayde, it's morning now."

He didn't stir at all. I gently shook his shoulder and still he slept on. I gave a pout at my inability to wake the sleeping exo. My brain is a wonder sometimes. I laughed at what I was about to say.

"Cayde the spicy ramen shops closing for good."

He shot up looking around confused.

"They can't be closing! Wait... What...When did I fall asleep?"

He was groggy. I don't think he was completely awake. His processors must be having a hard time booting this morning. I laughed again.

"How long have I been out?"

I shook my head.

"No idea. We've been sitting out here the entire night."

He quickly jumped up and looked around nervously. I stood up and stretched. I was completely sore and stiff from sitting still like that the entire night.

"Thank you..."

I smiled.

"Everyone needs to talk to someone sometimes."

We quietly walked to the local breakfast shop.

"Well, that proved to be interesting."

I laughed. He tried desperately to keep the conversation light. I don't think he was quiet accepting of the fact that I saw him at a weak point. I didn't want him to second guess his decision to open up to me.

"You never did guess correctly so you owe me a favor."

He gave a blank stare than laughed. A true, hearty, joy filled laugh.

"I took an unfair bet!"

He smiled keeping his tone light and airy.

"It's not my fault I was born forever a go you know. I can't help that I'm an ancient hag."

He gave a gently smile.

"Well, I couldn't have guessed that! Ancient yes... Hag? Not it the slightest. Save that term for the hive."

I laughed as we were seated. He scratched his head a moment.

"You know, I have journal pages scattered throughout the different worlds. I should probably collect them, not leave em out. Who know what I stashed there or when. Maybe go to Saturn or something. Could be fun. Don't know why Saturn sounds cool. I'm going to go visit Saturn!"

I laughed. I got the hint. He really was subtle about it. If you weren't listening, you think he was carving a joke. Something was happening there, something huge and he couldn't say what.

"We could go together..."

He trailed off. I was a little shocked, but I gave him a smile.

"I'd like that, gotta make sure someone watches out for you. Can't have you roaming places alone, getting lost and shit."

He gave a wicked grin while his eyes lit up.

"I don't get lost... It was one time! I had no idea where we were and there was no map of the area..."

He was silent a moment before continuing.

"But really thank you. I'm not used to having someone there for me. Hell, I'm barely used to talking without sarcasm and smartassery."

I shook my head.

"Smartassery? You made that word up!"

I smiled at him.

"You never have to thank me for that. You're my best friend...well pretty much my only friend other than Amanda."

Wasn't that a sad truth. It's a wonder I couldn't connect with anyone. I was so damn old that most people looked like children to me. We continued eating making causal conversation. Some about rare guns, others about ships and mechanics. When we finished he waved to me and we parted ways. I was smiling nearly the whole damn time.

"You definitely like him."

Arthur offered.

"Okay fine, maybe a bit. But he's my friend. I'm supposed to like him, otherwise why be friends."

I finally gave him something to appease him. Damn ghost always egging on something that didn't exist. I shook my head knowing he didn't mean like as in a friend but as in a relationship sort of way. He pouted at my answer. Good let him stew on that.

"I vote we go explore this morning, since if I go to sleep now, I'm not gunna be able to sleep tonight. Yay exhaustion time."

We made our way to Mars and began an exploration of everything that was there. I revisited where I first met my clan and smiled. While at one point it was sad, it was a place that brought nothing but pain, now it was the happy memories I thought on. I had hung a plaque for each of them on the walls. When I left my little memorial area, I continued to search the planet. I did happen to find one of Cayde's journal pages. It was about the time he had gotten into trouble, that he was in debt to many people. That he was in too deep. Ace must have been his kid. That letter was too personal for it not to be. Damn that sucked. He became an exo to protect his family. I grimaced... What could have made him decide that was the course of action to take. I quickly tucked the note back into the loot cashe if he needed it again. I shook my head. I seriously need to stop thinking about him. It was starting to become encompassing. I growled at my own mind.

At lunch time I found myself back at the ramen shop. Our bet was off... Why was I here? Am I insane? Why is my body not listening to my brain? Dumbass. He won't be there.

Low and behold he was sitting there.

"You know I think we've formed a habit now."

He turned to look at me.

"I think you may be right."

I sat down next to him.

"Have you slept?"

Testing the waters. That's what it felt like. A new step, a new direction. Actual friends.

"Nope. Gotta wait for tonight to do so. Don't want to mess up the schedule I got going."

He nodded. We fell back into casual conversation.

* * *

Months passed before anything of significance happened. We learned everything that we could about each other enjoying each other company. Finding out as much details about each other as we could. Zavala and Ikora seemed to catch on quick that something more may have been going on. Now mind you, there was no real relationship at that point. We still were trying to see what being friends were like. As everyone knows, I have the worst luck with friends. It had become a routine, a daily thing. I would go exploring, then come back to talk with Cayde for lunch. We would go after dark to seek adventures together, go exploring. It was on one of these nights that... Well... That our relationship truly began.

* * *

The dusty mountain rose before me. It seemed that it was touching the heavens. I assumed that this was some mountain range in Russia. I crawled through the crack the wall. Cayde was quickly making his way through right behind me.

"As much as I appreciate the view, tell me this ends soon."

Yup my face is red. Very red and I quickly glanced back at him, his body contorted into a crammed space and began to laugh, my hand slipping on some rocks sending me careening into a cavernous ravine.

"You know, if wouldn't have fallen if you were paying attention."

I shook my head as Cayde climbed down right behind me.

"Not my fault you say random comments like that. Especially distracting ones."

Banter, very flirty banter had become the norm. Cayde had grabbed me from behind. My face turned red again. I enjoyed this part we always got close, but never enough to say we were in a relationship.

"You know, it's funny, can't seem to stop teasing you."

I laughed and leaned back into him. I knew then, this is what I wanted... To be with him, not just as friend but as partners. We stood there for quite a while before Cayde leaned into me placing his head on my back.

"Right now, this is the most significant thing in my life. Being here with you."

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. He had become my love sometime during our weeks together, and while I had said nothing we both knew it. No words needed to be spoken. Our actions proved that to each other. We knew that we both had fallen for each other, but it wasn't like a burning fiery feeling, it was more like a slow crack in a damn that got bigger and bigger.

"I hope that this is enough..."

I shook my head. I knew what he meant. He was an exo, I was human. Relationships of that nature are...well very different. It wasn't like we could be together in a human to human relationship.

"It's more than enough. The time I spend with you has become precious to me."

We stood there quietly. It was the sort of relationship that didn't require constant physical touch, constant acknowledgment or even any sort of label. We were there for each other, and that was enough. We were friends and more. I knew I wanted to be a part of his life. I don't care how. Just in anyway.

"I'm a machine. I'm not human, are you sure it's okay?"

I turned to smile at him, raising an eyebrow.

"I didn't fall for you because of your looks or anything superficial. It was your personality. So, what you're not human. It doesn't matter to me."

We sat down in the cavern myself sitting in Cayde's lap. I still felt the pressure from his head on my back.

"If this is what love is, I'm glad I know now. No more questions on that front..."

I smiled.

"I think love is different for everyone. This is just our way."

The rambling in my mind... Truthfully I was freaking out. Arthur had been right. Shit, fucking ghost and his precognition. I'm never hearing the end of it.

"Well at least I'm not boring."

I started laughing.

"True, though I do believe it's time we head back. Don't want Zavala yelling at you again for magically disappearing."

He shook his head. Still holding me down.

"Not yet, I don't want to forget how this feel. I want to make sure I remember this moment forever. "

We sat there together for quite a while longer. This was the moment I knew that no matter what happened in my life I would have this. A new partner in crime. I smiled knowing that. Where ever my family was now, I'm sure they were happy at this turn of events. It was a funny sort of relationship. It didn't feel as unserious as boyfriend and girlfriend. It felt as if I had found a life partner. Someone to share my troubles with. It wasn't a type of fleeting feeling. It was encompassing like a wildfire, and it happened just as suddenly. One day were friends and then today were more. I'm still not quite sure what to label it. Maybe significant other or partner in crime best describes us. I could help but feel though that I was missing something big. As we flew back together he placed his hand into mine. I smiled at him and rested my head on his chest. It's one thing to feel love but another to receive it back and I felt lucky.

When we got back to the tower it's like the world had changed. No linger were we looking for the next fight. Or in my case avoiding it. No longer were the days just waiting for another mission to cone along. Now I knew I could enjoy the mundane everyday task especially since I had someone to look forward to seeing now. I laughed as we separated for the night once more touching heads together in endearment. I practically ran down to my room in excitement and flopped into my bed blushing.

"Told you so."

I growled still blushing. Of course, I would be in love with Cayde he's hard not to love.

 _"Hey Kayden! I'm not letting you win this battle!"_

 _A fake gun was in my hand._

 _"You're still going to lose. You're now where near as good as I am!"_

 _I took a shot from around the corner and her his vest go off._

 _"You sure about that?"_

 _We both seemed to be across the playing field from each other and shooting the laser beams at the vests. At the end of the match both of us sweaty and tired walked out of the room. His blue eyes piercing and grinning._

 _"You finally beat me Addy! You finally beat the king of laser tag!"_

 _I laughed._

 _"It's about damn time anyway. So would you say id be the queen of laser tag now?"_

 _His face fell into a devious look._

 _"You'd have to marry the king first!"_

 _I was holding my stomach in stitches._

 _"Oh man, do you use that on all the girls?"_

 _He shook his head._

 _"Only special individuals."_

 _I shook my head._

 _"Come on dork, were both going to be late to work at this point."_

 _We left the arcade center. As we rounded the corner to the car he grabbed my wrist. I looked at him._

 _"What's wrong?"_

 _He kissed me right then and there. I knew then this would be the person I spent the rest of my life with._

Tears fell from my eyes.

"What's wrong storm?"

I smiled.

"Happy memory. And yes, you were right many months ago. I'm just stubborn."

Many weeks continued like this, learning how to be in a relationship with each other. It was one night in the tower. I was sitting on my usually railing just smiling. It was very peaceful, calming. My mind thought back to earlier that day. It seems like everyone had something to say about Cayde and I. Everyone officially knew we were together, and not just as friends.

 _ **"Storm, doesn't it bother you that you can't kiss him really or can't physically be with him? I mean it's weird!"**_

 _ **I shook my head at Raven.**_

 _ **"Just because I'm not physically affectionate doesn't mean I love him any less. No, it's not a conventional relationship but its special."**_

 _ **Another guardian approached us.**_

 _ **"Yes but it's a little weird though, I mean has a fucking robot for Christ sakes."**_

 _ **A couple more people join in the bandwagon. I snapped.**_

 _ **"Y'all need to grow up, if it bothers you than don't date a damn exo but guess what my choice so goes bother someone else before I shoot you all."**_

I smiled. Of course, it bothered them. They wouldn't understand, probably too dedicated to their job to notice anything else. And Raven was so, innocent I guess. Young was probably a better word. I felt Cayde sit down next to me.

"After all this time... I'm still surprised your here."

I laughed. Tilting my head in confusion.

"Where else would I be?"

He gave a sad smile.

"Someone who can give a physical affection better than I can... I can't entirely kiss you ya know?"

I laughed again. Oh, he has been hearing the shit around the tower.

"You dummy, don't care about that shit, told you that from the get-go."

I decided to do something a little insane. Right at his mouth plates I planted a kiss, so he couldn't reply. I don't think I've ever really thought about what a kiss between us could be nor have I ever seen him so shocked before. It was priceless.

"You..."

He was still speechless as I was left in tears from laughing.

"See, there's ways around it. I still don't care you're a robot. I still don't care you can't be with me like a human or an awoken could. I love our relationship how it is."

I felt him get closer and pull me to his chest.

"You are a jewel."

I smiled into him.

"And you are a king."

I wasn't sure exactly when it happened, but I was completely enthralled by him. I wanted nothing more than to hang on to him for dear life and to never let go. Yup, definitely attached.

* * *

I didn't know that in a couple of weeks our world would turn upside down. That the entire place would go up in flames. Quiet literally in fact. It would forever set us on a path that would end in despair. But just like in pandoras box, the would be a small glimmer of hope.


	8. Chapter 8

You know, if someone told me then that my life was about to drastically change, drastically become something of a tale of survival... I wouldn't have believed it... Especially one where I would lose time to unconsciousness. Way too much time.

A strong storm had come in towards the afternoon. I ran through the tower heading to the briefing rooms. I swear I couldn't even think straight with the storms. Crazy weather. Stupid shit was making everyone on edge. It was then that shit started to go wrong. Com systems were spotty, electronics on the fritz with no real reason why. Hours had passed by, no one was quite sure what was going on. The briefing rooms were alive with commotion and confusion. Cayde and I took out leave for an early dinner. It seemed the entire tower was nervous, jumpy, guardians snapping at guardians for no real reason. The usually well lite courtyard seemed to be dull and dim, not a single guardian was playing with a ball or dancing. It was way to quiet. The rain pounded down throughout the tower soaking us through and through, so we took shelter at the ramen shop.

"Guess its ramen for dinner."

He quipped at me.

"Better than getting even more wet."

He smirked in my direction.

"Not like that!"

I sighed.

"Cayde... What the hell's going on with today, I could barely understand what everyone was frigen saying."

He shook his head.

"Probably nothing, my comms have been spotty at best all morning and same with reports from hunters in the field. Guess communication is taking a day off."

I laughed but I had a pit in my stomach. A dark horrible aching pit, that I should always listen to.

"I hope that's all it is."

The early hours of the evening fast approached. I wandered around the tower some more before going to look for Cayde in the vanguard briefing room. It was way later than the vanguard usually got off for the night. I stood there baffled at the scene in front of me. People were running about claiming that all the satellites had disappeared. It was uncontrolled chaos. What the hell did I just walk into? No really, what the hell? I walked toward Cayde but didn't quite make it as an explosion rocked my world. The blast opened a huge hole in the ground that I guess I decided to fall through. Brilliant really. When I woke moments later my ears were ringing and I was still confused at what the hell had just happened. There seemed to be a lot of that today. At least for me. What the hell hit us so hard that I fell through a huge hole. I was somewhere towards the bottom of the tower according to the map. I looked up to where the hole started and gulped. Thank the gods for being a guardian!

"What the fuck... what the actual fuck?"

Arthur was in front of me.

"The red legion has attacked..."

Rage pierced through my body spreading like a wildfire. The fucking cabal bastards.

"Your fucking shitting me right? The same red legion that keeps boasting there the best, that they destroy worlds blah blah blah..."

He seemed to look down.

"Fuck this shit, let's go kill some cabal."

I took off running. I had zero weapons so that was priority number one. While my hands are a great weapon, no so great against an army. Might be more fun though… I wandered my way to the armory gritting my teeth at the people trying to escape the tower. I grabbed whatever weapons I could find and started to make my way top side.

"Hey there..."

A golden gun went off. Cayde was okay, of course the stupid idiot was. I quickly ran up to him and placed my head on his.

"Glad you're safe, thought you ran off to kill cabal without me."

I heard the underlying, I thought you may have died from that fall. Our time was cut short though, we both had a job to do.

"I'm gunna go topside. Put a stop to this madness."

I nodded.

"You're not alone, I'll meet you there."

He winked.

"Whoever kills the most cabal owes the loser a drink!"

I smiled.

"Bring it on, metal man!"

We parted ways as he jumped up a level. I ran through killing as many cabal as I could. I wanted to beat him at his own damn game again. I watched Ikora jump onto a cabal tracer ship to take it down as I ran past. I think if Ikora was in on our bet...she just won. Which is where I wound up in the courtyard being picked up by Amanda. Talk about going through the motions. I didn't feel like me, what had just happened didn't quite get to me...rather I couldn't let it yet. I didn't want to think about what had just happened. We can rebuild and mourn later, this was not the time.

"Found that guardian..."

I smiled at her as she turned to me.

"Didn't realize they were talking about you storm. Are you sure you're okay with going through this?"

My eyes burned with fire.

"You don't attack my home without some retribution."

She smiled at me, nodding her head in reply.

"Glad you're on our side."

She quipped at me I gave her a thumbs up as I left the ship. My helmet on, that way no one could see the hatred in my eyes. I was angrier than I had been in a long time. I fought through the ship only to come face to face with Ghual. I was pissed, I was ready, I wanted to give the asshole a taste of what I thought of him... until all of my light left. Arthur and I fell to the ground simultaneously. I grabbed him and pulled him close. What the hell did this dickhead just do. I looked up weakly never letting this idiot see my face. I felt myself getting kicked off the edge and the next thing I knew I was free falling.

I hadn't been expecting to open my eyes. Nor the amount of pain I felt. I quickly surveyed my surroundings. I was in the last city. It had crumbled, the buildings around me were falling apart. Tears came to my eyes as I sat up, my body filled with pain. I had lost my light. I had just lost what it meant to be a guardian… but I was still a soldier, I had that. Where was Arthur? It was my next thought, I had had him in my hand before I fell. I dared not call out. I didn't want to alert any cabal that might be in the area. I stood and made my way slowly down towards what I assumed were the sewers. It would provide cover. I had to survive, I would not die like this. I stumbled into a wall as a ship passed over head. I saw a light a way down. It looked like a ghost. A very lost ghost and a very exposed ghost. I tried to quickly make my way over to it. As I got closer, I saw it was Arthur.

"Arthur..."

I croaked out. He came rushing over to me. Quickly healing me.

"I can heal you...but I can't resurrect you, they've evacuated the planet... We're on our own..."

I nodded... survival was key... I must stand strong, fight, and live. Find Cayde, find everyone.

 _"SERE... it's an acronym that stands for survive, evade, resist, escape. If you are ever behind enemies' lines you will use these skills to come home alive."_

 _I sat back, almost in fear, what did I just sign up for? Was the military really... Something that I could handle?_

 _"Now this may scare you, but just know it is by your own will that you can and will survive."  
_  
"Arthur... We will get through this. We will fight this, and we will win..."

I think I said that more to give myself motivation. We escaped through the very wall we had entered through years ago where I first met the fallen. I thought back to that simple time a melancholy smile on my face.

"Arthur... I'm glad you're okay."

He blipped in response.

"I am too. I'm still baffled you survived that fall."

I shook my head.

"I really don't know how I did... I shouldn't have, I should be dead... Traveler must be watching out for me."

Arthur nodded.

"It must be, it's crazy to think someone could steal the light like that from the traveler... I mean Oryx stole light but not on this scale..."

He trailed off. He was just as worried as I was. We made our way slowly across the planet. No ship...a broken handgun as a weapon... No communication. I survived off birds and berries in the long run. The first night was the worst out of all of them. I jumped at every single noise and there was no relaxing, I was on edge for every single moment. I had no way to get to my safe haven. Unless I walked all the way there and that was a risk, I wasn't quite willing to take. I was scared. Alone. Ok, I was going a little crazy with the silence. I started asking Arthur to record video logs.

"Arthur... We should record this journey. It'll give me something to focus on."

He came around in front of me.

"Go ahead... We're recording."

He responded mechanically. He had lost his drive. His personality had become muted. It broke my heart seeing him like this.

"Um... Well hi person... People watching this... If anyone... It's been four days since the tower collapsed... Four days of being out in the wilds... No weapons or armor worth a damn. No food worth mentioning, nothing that could sustain me... I've been following a river, keeping myself hydrated when I can. I hunt the local birds and gather the berries. I can't keep much on me. I don't have any bags or any canteens. Don't want to be weighed down if I can help it. Uh... Yeah... So... I don't know what will become of the last city... Or even me for that matter... My name is Storm... At least in this life it is... I do know a little about who I was before I was a guardian... My name was Adrine Davus back then... I had a daughter... And a husband but lost them during the collapse. Today, I believe is a good day to try and find some sort of working weapon."

I pulled out a side arm. Broken and busted and put it up to the camera.

"This is all I carry, not in working condition. I don't know if I will survive this... We've lost the light to the red legion. It no longer exists in our world. If I die... It will be a final death. No more will I be resurrected. I don't dare risk scavenging like the fallen... But I'm almost to the point where I will need to."

Days turned into weeks...weeks into months. I had lost track of time. The one thing that kept me going was to see Cayde again. To make sure he was okay. I let that thought drive me to push forward and survive. Clung to it like the last hope I had. I kept those logs at least once a day to give me something to look forward to for the day to day.

"Cayde... If you see this... know I am fighting... I will not give up until I know you are safe... Alive... Or dead... It doesn't matter... As long as I see you again... Our time was so short...so much has happened. I feel like this is just a stop, numbness, something we will overcome, something we can pull through. I still love you... I probably will forever, even when dead... You have become everything to me. My reason to keep fighting. Keep walking. Keep moving and breathing."

One such day, I found an encampment weapons still there and I quickly grabbed what I could from those dead around me.  
It seemed as of late a falcon was guiding us. I followed it without question. Birds are keen to those things. As I picked up my weapon the red legion attacked. Stupid fucking trap... Should've known. I quickly made my way through them following the falcon. The bird guided me to a group of people where it landed on a woman's arm. I nearly bursted into tears seeing people for the first time in months. Hawthorne was her name. Someone who lived outside the walls for years. We quickly went with her to a placed called the farm. It truly was like a farm, but in the distance the broken piece of the traveler sat.

"Arthur...is that?"

Hawthorne interrupted.

"A shard of the traveler... It's a dead zone. People who go there never come back."

I looked at her. I felt drawn to it. Like the light pulsed through it.

"I must... It may be the last hope I have right now."

She nodded, and we set out. My mind drifted to where Cayde may have been... I really hoped he wasn't dead... My mind went through thousands of possibilities...I had to concentrate on my survival and all sudden...it flooded into my mind... I was overwhelmed as I fought through the fallen. Seeing people again made it to where he invaded my thoughts hoping he had found a safe haven somewhere.

"Arthur... Cayde... he's not gone right? He can't be gone... Right?"

Arthur looked taken a back as we made our way through the fallen.

"First time I've heard you get emotional... Finally caught up to you?"

I shrugged.

"I don't just have to worry about my survival out in the wilds anymore. I'm not concentrating on just keeping my ass alive. Though... He's been on my mind, my motivation to keep fighting so to speak..."

Arthur hummed in response.

"I'm sure Cayde is fine, that man seems to come back from everything."

I smiled another fallen gone as we got that much closer to the shard. Once the area was clear around the shard, we got a good close look.

"It's the light! I feel it!"

The ghost disappeared, and I felt the light return to me. We were ambushed by fallen. I smiled as my golden gun was let loose. This close to the shard, the light inside me kept refilling endlessly, my goodness I've never shot so many rounds before. I felt alive again.

"We should see if the vanguard needs our help... We owe them."

I nodded at Arthur.

"The only problem is where to look. We should help the farm for now... Otherwise we risk searching across an entire universe. I'm sure they're trying to do something to get the traveler back."

Arthur beeped in response. A few weeks later we found an encoded transmission... It was from Zavala. Hawthorne was pissed we were leaving to titan, but we promised to be back. As we landed Zavala told us it was a lost cause. Arthur stepped in and we cleared the area. I walked up to greet him.

"It's unlike you to give up. You and your horrible plans."

Zavala gave me a look.

"Guardian, we have no light, the city is lost, and the speaker gone..."

I snarled. How could the one person who gave the damn city hope be so...

"You dumbass. There are still guardians out here fighting, there are still people who need rescuing...we take an oath to protect. You have always been a damn beacon of it. Looking in the face of danger and saying not today. We will take the city back. No ands, ifs, or butts...or we will die trying but at least we have done our best."

Zavala looked taken aback, startled.

"You are correct."

I grinned.

"Now where is Cayde."

He shook his head.

"No one has seen him, Eris or Ikora since the city fell."

I cussed.

"Arthur we need the vanguard back together. Try searching for his damn ghost."

Stupid why didn't I think of that before. That was a pretty idiotic move on my part. I'm such and idiot sometimes.

"Guardian...you are correct, we need the vanguard. Bring everyone here... And thank you"

I shook my head.

"Go to the farm on earth. We will meet you there. With Cayde and Ikora."

I quickly gave him the coordinates. We got back into the ship, borrowed ship… not stolen, and searched for a signal...which brought us to Nessus. There we were able to home in on his signal.

"In over my head...VEX Trap...failsafe?"

I about busted into tears hearing his voice for the first time in almost a year. The shock tossed me into a memory, something that hadn't happened in months.

 _I ran up to the door of our house. They didn't know I was home from deployment. The excitement I felt was palpable in the air. I rang the doorbell and waited. Kayden opened the door without looking. His face was one of shock and awe. Tears brimming his eyes._

 _"Your home..."_

 _I smiled._

 _"I'm back finally."_

 _I was grabbed in an embrace that took my breath away._

 _"6 months... 6 months I've been away from you, my king... And now I'm back..."_

 _Kayden kissed me without hesitation an all-encompassing kiss that was fueled by unbridled passion. It was warm, and comforting. I kissed him back, knowing I had my love back in my arms. When we finally broke apart, we pushed our heads together._

 _"Now how should we surprise our little girl?"_

 _He smiled._

 _"Well we should go surprise her in the classroom."_

 _We jumped immediately into the car and drove to her school. We went to the office and told them the plan. We walked down the pathway and got to her classroom where they were watching a movie. We sat quietly in the back waiting for her to turn around. As the movie ended and the bell rung for the next class she stood and ran to me. Completely knocking me out of my seat._

 _"Mama!"_

 _I smiled and held her in my arms._

 _"My little ace!"  
_  
I fell to my knees in shock. Arthur's voice barely reached my ears.

"Vex trap? What us Cayde getting us into now? Storm?"

He flew in front of my face.

"Oh fuck..."

I barely whispered. What the fuck... How the fuck...

"Another memory?"

Damn it talk about bad timing. My mind drifted back to the night where Cayde told me about ace and his queen.

Why the fuck did this happen now? Somehow...and Ace? Ace was mine...

"Arthur...shit...we need to find Cayde now... Deal with memory later..."

Arthur seemed concerned, but I'd gotten wrapped in my own mind. Was it possible...was it truly possible that Cayde...? The man I love in this life was in fact Kayden... He truly had lost his memories as an exo? Cayde was...

I shook my head tears threating to fall. My face probably looked like I had seen a ghost. We followed the signal to a ship with a very rude AI named failsafe. After running through the entire planet chasing Cayde unending loop teleportation we finally arrived in front of him. Still in the loop

"Storm! I don't have time to explain...hydra"

Queue me getting pissed and shooting the thing to death.

"Cut the power, get me out..."

He rambled in a Cayde like fashion, but I could only nod.

"Say something! Say you got it!"

Arthur interrupted.

"We got it! Now how..."

Cayde interrupted him then.

"Oh my cotton socks! Did you not just hear what I just said?"

He then disappeared from sigh and the breath I had been holding was released.

"I'm guessing this is why they don't like him leaving the tower."

I laughed.

"Arthur, we should go get him now."

We quickly cut the power and made our way to the central hub of the exodus black. Mind you we had to fight our way there. With failsafe being failsafe, I guess. Apparently, Arthur was getting annoyed by her. When we finally got to the center. He stood there. Talking with Arthur. I was completely silent. After the conversation I ran up to him I really didn't cat what was said and embraced him knocking him down.

"Cayde..."

He put his chin on top of my head.

"Storm... I wasn't sure you made it... They said Ghual through you off the ship down to the city below."

I nodded.

"Not sure how I survived. No one knew where you were. If it wasn't for failsafe amplifying your ghosts signal...I wouldn't have found, you..."

We sat there like that for a while.

"Cayde I..."

He shook his head and gently pressed his mouth to mine. I closed my eyes. When we parted, he looked toward the exit.

"Go get Ikora, I'll meet you at this farm. We can talk after we get the city back."

The hidden meaning in his words were clear. If we make it out alive, we can be together again...or something along those lines. I smiled sadly.

"I'll stay for just a moment more. It's been months... Survival and evasion was on the forefront of my mind. I just need to make sure...your real..."

I felt him hum. I still sat in his arms. I wanted badly to tell him...I wanted him to know I knew who he was...just in case we didn't make it... But did he really need the distraction of knowing something like that while I was potentially going to lose my life? I vowed that as soon as this was over, I would tell him.

"I have a dare for you. I know a secret you should know and if you figure it out before I tell you at the end of this mess... Well, you'll know."

It was more of a promise than a dare... But it worked all the same.

"Another bet eh? Better stay alive and kicking then."

He winked.

"Wonder what this secret is? Is it food? Is it how to make spicy ramen?"

I dissolved into a fit of giggles.

"You would think its food."

I gave him one last kiss before leaving and walked away.

"By the way, I counted 110 cabal."

I laughed as he grinned.

"You won that one, I don't remember the number."

I smiled and continued walking, my heart clenched in panic.

"I'll see you at the farm once we get Ikora back."

I called over my shoulder he gave a goofy wave just sitting there. I didn't want to leave...I knew I had to do this. I don't know how many guardians still had light... or if we were alone. Why did this end of the world nonsense catch up with me? What the hell was the point in this. Why did they want the traveler so bad? It made no sense. Did this Ghual person want it for himself or something else? I sighed... If I was the only guardian with light... It meant that I would be facing him alone... Just like Oryx. Fucking beautiful.

We headed to Io to find Ikora. We took no rest; the world had waited long enough for this. She was just as depressed as Zavala...was Cayde really the only one who had any hope and any plan to get our city back. I shook my head in aggravation. After helping her on Io we continued back to the farm. A couple of days had passed, and I was glad Cayde was still safe. In this new world you don't know when you would die. I hated feeling like I would lose everything with a moment's notice.

The minute got back to the farm they had a meeting. I stood outside listening patiently. It wasn't enough. We needed to get the city back...I knew that... But I knew I'd be alone in this quest.

"Arthur, why is everyone saying I'm a hero for defeating Oryx...I'm just doing my job."

Arthur glanced my way almost cautiously

"Because he is one of the worst kinda of hive there is."

Ghual... Why? Why would you desire the traveler so greatly that you would commit genocide? Why was that the damn norm? There meeting was over, and I quickly ran to Cayde not caring who saw anymore and tackled him again.

"I'm starting to think you're not going to let me go. Literally."

I shook my head.

"Shut up. I'm allowed to be scared."

I am scared. I am so damn scared to lose him. Fuck my own world, without him... It's not worth it. Especially now. I forgot the rest of the world and kissed him. Don't know how many minuets passed until I heard Zavala clearing his throat.

"Guardian?"

I glared at him.

"Shove it titan"

I kissed him again before looking at Ikora and Zavala.

"Guardian, you are one with the light… we need your help."

I shook my head.

"I know. But for Christ's sakes. I haven't seen Cayde in months, almost a year and while you guys are so let's go down the almighty now... I haven't had a decent night's rest in months. I haven't had a chance to even get my head on right. So, I'm taking that opportunity tonight. Before we go and destroy and save the city. Let me tell you something. We can attack tomorrow night. We don't have to go right this second. Give everyone a chance to recuperate. Or they'll be no help to you."

Ikora nodded, I'm pretty sure I heard her giggle. I looked at her, yup she was giggling. Zavala had been sufficiently shut up. I grabbed Cayde by the hand and climbed up the side of the rock with him in tow. I looked around at the small hideout I had made up here. A small mat, a lantern and some snacks were in a tin on the side. It wasn't much but it was an escape.

"You've been staying all the way up here?"

I smiled.

"Yup. Too much we're gunna die nonsense at the farm."

He laughed.

"You're sure we can do this?"

He sounded uneasy.

"It's just another battle to win."

He smiled.

"Well I still don't know what this secret is. I haven't even researched it yet! Care to give a dog bone here?"

I laughed.

"When did you turn into a dog?"

He gave a very convincing woof.

"Okay I get it. It's got something to do with your journals."

He looked towards the shard.

"Well damn. I shoulda kept all of the pages."

He started pulling the one he had on him out. I laid down quietly on his lap.

I wound up laying on him the entire night. Not really sleeping just enjoying the time we had. I only wish that peace would last. I grimaced through my teeth. I knew it wouldn't. I would be the one to defeat Ghual. Defeat one of the greatest enemies we have ever faced.

I should have asked for more time. I wish I had. Hindsight was 20/20. I should be thankful for at least that night. For my whole world would change after I fought Ghual.

The next morning, I still wasn't ready. I must have pretended to sleep for hours, I was too nervous. Silly to think that this made me nervous after Oryx, but truth be told I felt that for this battle we had so much more to lose. It didn't help that I was scared to tell Cayde that I knew who he was, I knew he really did have a wife and child... It was that train of thought, that I knew I just had to come back alive to tell him. And hopefully I would get that chance. I gritted my teeth again. I didn't want to worry him if I died. He shouldn't have to live with his wife dying again.

"You haven't slept..."

I heard him say. It broke the train of thought that caused me to blush. I called myself his wife. We weren't married in this life. Where did my head decided to get that damn picture?

"Shush, I'm trying to. Doesn't help when I'm this nervous."

He laughed.

"Good thing I have my will done and written. Even added a couple of people."

I shook my head.

"You sound way too happy about that. When did you manage that?"

He smiled when I opened my eyes to look at him.

"Before you and Ikora got back. You know, just in case."

I nodded.

"You know I never asked... Do you remember meeting your ghost for the first time?"

His laughed seemed to echo of the mountains.

"Oh yes! I have it written somewhere but Sundance, my ghost, scared the hell out of me so badly I ran straight off a cliff!"

I burst out in laughter clutching on to my sides.

"Didn't think you'd laugh that hard!"

It took quite a while for me to stop. Truthfully, I was laughing to hide the pain in my chest. I was so terrified, so stuck by the thought that the very person before me, this may be the last time I see him.

"You know... what did ever happen to the reef?"

He shrugged.

"Who knows..."

I steeled a glance his way.

"You do know just not willing to share. You and your damn secrets"

Once again, I smiled towards him leaned up and kissed him.

"Look who's talking!"

We spent the rest of the morning just talking. About pretty much everything. Just laughing, relaxing, borrowing stolen time. The afternoon was the rest of the planning session. I was to get on to ghauls almighty. Using a stolen cabal ship. A weapon ship of sorts and disable it. Make it go boom. Than meet back up with them at the last city. Then I would be close enough to teleport to Ghaul's ship...with Cayde's vex teleporter.

"That better not be the same one..."

I growled under my breath. He heard me a gave a chuckle.

"It is, but it should work just fine."

I cast a sideways glare at him.

"If I get trapped, I'm haunting you."

Arthur popped out steeling a glance towards cayde.

"Well at least you don't already have experience with such things."

Cayde sighed dramatically.

"Oh, woe is me, I worked so hard and get nothing for my progress."

I shook my head laughing. Zavala looked ready to kill us all the while Ikora shook her head.

"This is nothing to laugh about."

Zavala stated. I raised a brow to him.

"Some of us deal with crap situations with humor. Get with the program."

Queue Zavala lecture and Ikora laughing. I didn't really pay attention to what he was saying. Something along the lines of Cayde's a bad influence. My heart about stopped. That's right... Cayde and I... Or should I say Kayden. I shook my head. This was not the time for that. Stop. Stupid… Stupid brain. Focus. I smiled, night was falling. This would go down quick, and there was a real chance... everyone could die.

"Well I guess it's time to shine! Well some of us need it, Cayde's got most the shine covered all ready."

He cast a side long glance. I kissed him one last time and ran towards my ship, not saying goodbye. I don't want to say good bye, so I'm not gunna say it. Feels too final.

I boarded the ship quietly. I was in serious shooting mode. Arthur did most of the talking, we fought our way through, getting ready to blow the place up as Cayde eloquently put it. And then came running out side... In front of the bright burning sun.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me right now!"

Arthur groaned.

"Outside than..."

I ran outside into the blistering heat...no... My body felt like it was boiling alive.

"Stick to the shadows!"

"No shit!"

On levels of dumb, this was fucking stupidity wrapped up in a handbasket. It felt like hours out there when really a couple of minutes went by. When we reached then interior, I was sweating. Which is also a no shit moment, but I smelt burnt. It was pretty gross in that helmet. Ikora had said something about being in position and then I heard Cayde.

"Hey, Hawthorne says we're reaching our insertion point. And I'm not big on goodbye scenes. So, you do… what you gotta do. Make it out alive, okay? I need someone who gets my jokes..."

Tears came to my eyes. I couldn't reply so I moved forward. I knew the last line he said, meant something more, something deeper. Him and his damn humor. It drew me back to the time he made his first guess about my birth year. It was his loneliness talking. We came up to the weapon the almighty had. Holy fuck the damn thing was ginormous. It ran the span of the ship, pulsating energy and solar rays. How the fuck did they even build this thing? I mean for Christ sake they look like fighting potatoes! I shook my head as we made our way around destroying the machine before making a hasty escape towards the city. When we were safely in the ship, I took my helmet off.

"Arthur... We'll be fine right? This feels like Oryx all over again. I can't deal with that again. I just can't! I can't lose the people I love again."

Arthur seemed to give a cuddle hug into my face.

"We will be fine... They will be fine... Cayde will still crack horribly timed jokes."

I nodded wearily, not quiet trusting Arthur's words. We flew right into the city before getting shot out of the sky. I listened to the radio chatter as I ran to the coordinates. I needed to see Cayde... I needed more than his voice. I ran through energy barriers courtesy of Hawthorne. As I fought my way to the rally point, I couldn't look back, there were people lying in the streets. I didn't want to look. So much fighting, will it ever be over? My breath hitched in my throat as I saw Zavala get thrown into a wall. There was no way any of them could come with me now. Zavala just recently shot. Ikora looking just as bad and Cayde without an arm and a leg.

"We will be fine, go it's up to you now."

Zavala said. I shut my eyes tight.

"Looking good starshine!"

I smiled.

"Stop leaving me to save the world for once?"

I quickly opened them to Cayde, he had a gentle smile on his face. I ran through the gate. The teleport made me a bit woozy as I stumbled and fell when I came through. I shook my head and continued forward.

 _"Kayden... We are deep within enemy lines with no support. Our extraction point is 40 miles away. And this ship in supposed to fix is not going to happen. It's so trashed that I'm lucky to be able to even get it to turn on."_

 _He placed his hand on my shoulder. I looked around the broken destroyed C-130H, completely tattered. Carbon fiber dust surround the cockpit, wires hung out of the control panels, it looked like there had been a firefight inside the ship._

 _"Let's make it go boom then. Get ready to run like hell."_

 _He lined the aircraft with explosives and set the charge. I looked back to where the aircraft was about to have its final day. Shaking my head, I followed him. We ran about 10 miles before stopping. As we stopped, we heard the explosion, felt it, it rattled our bones._

 _"They heard that."_

 _He smiled._

 _"Great distraction, no? Now let's get the fuck out of here."_

 _He grabbed my hand and ran._

I made it to the top of the ship. I was getting better at letting the memories not consume me. Ghual was waiting for me. Waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. It was a hard-fought battle. Between his minions and fighting a cabal using a guardian's power... I couldn't tell what was worse.

Fuck this shit to hell! I was getting tired of dodging and avoiding his attacks. He blabbed on about he was deserving of the light that the traveler should have chosen him. I had nothing to fight for. Nothing to die for.

"Your fucking kidding me, right? I have everything to fight for. We don't need this city we can make a new one. I fight for those I love... My friends... And my makeshift family... I fight for those I lost. My clan and the thousands you killed. You know why you were not chosen? Because you have no values! No morals. You think taking another's life is okay. Yes, we do so to. But I don't fight when I don't need to. If I'm directly threated yes, I will. If not, I mostly leave everything alone. You just fight whenever the mood suits you... Being a guardian isn't about power! It's about compassion, empathy and doing what's right even when it's hard."

He was pissed. I felt my body get slammed up against the wall. My head taking the brunt of the impact. My vision swam in front of me. I couldn't pass out, not now, not yet. My body was wearing thin. Cut's and bruises lined my arms, Arthur couldn't keep up with healing me at this speed. I had very little strength left. It came down to one final face-off between me and Ghual. We rushed at each other, my Golden Gun shinning with glory, hitting him square in the chest, him lining up his own barrage of powers and getting me right in the same damn place. I landed one final blow to him. One I never though in a million years I would land. Running over to where the light was pouring out of a vent a let myself bathe in it. Quickly running behind him and letting loose my knives. Finally getting the hang of what Cayde and I had been working on. It wasn't accurate, but it did the job. I had finally destroyed the horror that was Ghual. I had thought. I was on my knees, trying to keep conscious when I looked up to see him become the light itself and ascend. Fuck! How was I supposed to beat something like that? I felt fear and guilt. I couldn't defeat him. Not like this and not alone. I had failed, and I would die. I was almost resigned to my fate but by some stroke of luck, the traveler awakened. Destroying Ghual where he stood. I was wide eyed. It was over, we had won. I breathed a sigh of relief and promptly gave way to unconsciousness.

I wasn't sure how long I was out for. I knew my body had been badly damaged during that fight, Arthur couldn't heal me correctly either. There was just too much. From what I was told I was in a coma for a year... I remember flashes, brief images. They say that you can still here and see everything in a coma. It was only sometimes. Some moments I can remember hearing. Others it could almost seem that I could see what was going on. It's still a bit fuzzy when I think back on it. And I just have to say: A COMA REALLY? YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH! Damn body. When I did wake up it was to an empty room. Well almost empty. Arthur was at the window talking to what I assumed was me. I stayed quiet with my eyes closed to listen. What better way to find out what was going on than to listen.

"You know, so many things have happened since Ghual. They found Osiris, Anna bray and Rasputin. A guy name Callus put out a challenge even... I mean it's crazy. Hell even the tower is rebuilt. I'm sure that'll shock the hell out of you. Cayde comes in to check on you all the time. I've shown him the videos of us ragging against the wild. Even the one where you fell off a cliff into the ravine below you klutz. He even told me that's similar to how he found his ghost… He always reads you stories out if his journals. I always record them. Just so you can see when you wake up. Everyone's loosing hope...that you'll ever wake up... My partner... Why did you have to face Ghual..."?

I smiled.

"Because it was the right thing to do."

Arthur wiped back around to see me lying in bed with my eyes open. I've never been hugged by a ghost...nor tackled... But that's pretty close to what Arthur accomplished. Slamming right into my chest and cuddling.

"I'm back! Sounds like I was out for a while. How long?"

Arthur didn't move.

"A whole year..."

My jaw dropped. I was asleep for a year. A whole fucking year, I had lost a whole year… Well, fuck, no wonder I'm sore. I glared at him. That couldn't have been right.

"You're fucking pulling my leg."

He shook his whole body.

"What do you mean a year?"

I was shaking. I was asleep a whole year? A whole god damn year...and Cayde still didn't know? Fuck, I'm repeating myself. What the fuck. Queue panicking. Arthur probably saw my panic. Well, to be fair, I wasn't expecting it.

"You were in a coma the past year... They didn't think you would ever wake up... No one would pull the plug so to speak..."

A door slammed open. Cayde, Zavala, and Ikora stood at the entrance with Amanda in tow behind them as they came bursting through the door.

"Storm..."

Cayde said with an almost breathless voice. He quickly walked over to my bed side and laid down on top of me.

I smiled and slowly attempted to move my arm. Which felt like a million pins and needles.

"Well, I guess were having a party in here today."

Amanda was the next person over and she glared at me. I shrunk back into the pillow.

"And what sort of time is this! A whole year! I have been going crazy and you just wake up one day like you're done taking nap?"

I laughed at her outburst.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm still having trouble moving."

Arthur quickly squeezed out from under Cayde and began to heal my disused muscles. The pins and needles slowly faded, and I sat up right.

"Guardian, you gave us quiet the scare finding you like that."

I smiled toward Zavala.

"Ghual wanted to play ping pong with my body I guess."

He kept his stoic face.

"It's good to have you back you've missed most of the action."

I shook my head.

"I think I'll avoid action for a while thank you very much."

He nodded. They turned to leave.

"Hey... Thanks for grabbing me..."

I gave a soft smile and Cayde sat up with me. Zavala nodded, and they left chattering the entire time. Amanda said something about a party. When the door closed, Cayde and I sat together for a while. Just enjoying each other's company. Not speaking just... Together resting on each other. When Cayde finally spoke, it was something I wasn't expecting.

"I'm leaving... For a while, there's something I must investigate... You be my back up? If I need it?"

I nodded. Damn I just got him back but if he was leaving after I had just woken up... It was major. Worse than Ghual and oryx major. Shit. He was leaving the tower… He never went on missions, he wasn't allowed to…

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

I knew this was the hardest part. He gently placed his moth plates on my lips and left. Fuck. I kicked myself. He was probably just about to leave when I woke up.

"Arthur... I never told him...and I have a bad feeling about this mission... He's too secretive... He's protecting me from something, protecting everyone."

Damn riotous bastard. Arthur floated next to me.

"Told him what?"

I cussed again. I didn't tell Arthur either. I'm a fucking moron.

"Arthur, Cayde is Kayden. Ace is the nickname for our daughter."

He fell onto the bed. I think he was in shock. No noises. No movement. I could've sworn he was wide eyed.

"Uh Arthur?"

No response.

"Did I fry your circuits?"

He suddenly was in front of my face.

"When did you find this out?"

I laughed.

"Right before we found him on Nessus."

He made a choked sound.

"You are shitting me..."

I laughed as he went on a ramble.

"You knew for a week… a whole damn week and never said anything! You were in a coma for a year. How, what, why."

I smiled. His frustration was hysterical. It was like a computer trying to remember something. Instead just giving you millions of pop ups.

"Arthur if I told him… And I did wind up dying, he would have lost his wife twice."

He stopped mid-flight pace.

"Oh... But why not tell me?"

I giggled.

"Because you would have told him."

He gave a dramatic sigh.

"True."

I smiled as nurses and doctors barged into the room. Asking all sorts of questions try to ascertain what my condition was. After about 2 days of healing seasons with Arthur I was on my feet walking around. The tower had changed so much. I was in shock and awe at how the area had changed. The courtyard was at the very top dead center while the hanger was to the northside and the shops to the south. The living quarters started four floors below us. Arthur helped guide me around as I looked on in amazement. I stopped by to see Zavala. He was in the main courtyard overlooking the city.

"Guardian, what can I help you with?"

I smiled.

"Thank you."

He looked at me confused.

"It is I who should be thanking you, you have saved us all. Why are you thanking me?"

I smiled.

"For restoring the tower and the city. For bringing a sense of normalcy back to us all."

He looked taken a back as I walked away with that headed toward Ikora. She smiled in greeting.

"It's good to see you on your feet again storm."

I nodded.

"I don't think I could lie down much longer without going stir crazy."

She laughed.

"I don't blame you, but the beauty sleep is something you must have needed."

I nodded.

"Thank you Ikora. For watching over Cayde for me while I slept away."

A sad smile graced her face.

"He wasn't the same with you not here."

I gave her a smile.

"I know..."

We bid farewell to each other and as I walked away. My next stop was going to be a very long one. Off to the hangar. On my approached Amanda practically tackled me. I wasn't expecting that. We had been friends, coworkers. But now she was family.

"Glad to have you back storm! We missed you in here."

Four more of the techs rushed up to me. We stood there chatting for a bit before Amanda motioned me to follow her. She was working on a sparrow by what I guess was her new workshop. We kept light conversation going until I finally cracked. Tears flooded my eyes. I felt her hand on my shoulder.

"A whole year... I left him for a whole year... And he couldn't stay... Something happened... Something bad."

Amanda looked over to an empty spot with a chicken standing there.

"That's his workshop over there. Maybe he left a clue there."

I nodded. Amanda smiled at me and stood up.

"When you're ready for work come find me."

I nodded and walked over to where Cayde workshop was. Looking for any clues to where he might have gone. One little telegraph was sitting in the clutter of his desk. On that didn't make any sense to me...but it was from Petra. The Petra venge from the reef. So, I was right, he did know something.

The note wrote: "Free irregular kelvin radiation underneath liminal atmosphere layers in Venusian entryway. Deep interstellar simulation traces reveal elongated sidereal screens. Caldera apertures leave long free radical omissions. Mitigate if lateral lacerations yield neutrons."

What the fuck was she going on about. That made zero sense at all!

"Arthur can you scan this, so I can look at it later."

He popped out behind me.

"Sure! Find something that would help?"

I shrugged.

"Maybe but it's a lot of nonsense."

I walked back toward Amanda.

"Got anything small for me to start on. I don't think I'm quite ready for heavy lifting yet."

She smiled and put me on the first sparrow that came in. I smiled working.

 _"Kayden! I got a job at the airport finally!"_

 _He laughed and spun me around._

 _"You finally did it! Now you can join the reserves! Leave active duty life to the pro's!"_

 _I laughed._

 _"It's to bridge the time when I take leave."_

 _He stopped._

 _"What do you mean?"_

 _I smiled._

 _"I'm pregnant."_

 _A giant smile appeared on his face._

A grin split my face in two. More memories. I slowly worked on the sparrow. The power plant of the thing was hiccupping. The day drone on and by dinner time I was ready to call it. Amanda and I walked to where the new ramen store was. I was greeted with joy by the owners. I laughed but it felt empty. I sat in the courtyard as night fell looking at the letter. It was bothering me I rewrote it about fifteen different ways but for the life of me couldn't figure out what it was. Nor what it meant. I was to the point of frustration. I threw it down and that's when it clicked. I could see the message glaring at me.

'Fikrul Alive, Distress Call From Illyn.'

My jaw dropped. The Fikrul from the house of wolves?

"Arthur… We may have another huge problem, and it may be worse than red legion… Way worse…"

So yes, I was shocked, and frightened. Just waking up, just getting back to my feat and already we had another huge issue to deal with. One that Cayde was trying to sort out by himself. I wouldn't let him, not if I had anything to say about it.


	9. Note

I apologize for it nearly being a year for an update, I don't like how this story reads and i kinda just gave up on it. Im currently revisiting it but ive lost my interest in destiny. So i apologize if this takes longer than expected.


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